Because You Need Me (Falling for You, Book Two) Read Online Free PDF Page B

filled with her fussing over me, telling me to stand up straight and monitoring my food intake even though I never had a problem with weight. It was very clear to me that appearances meant everything to her, but was she so deluded that she couldn't see that I was hurting? That I just wanted to be accepted in my fun patchwork skirt and dingy t-shirt with my split ends? Would this really be all I'd get? A mom that would only show signs of happiness and pride when Xander's name was brought into the conversation? Xander, a man that would probably put me in the rearview when the month was up? Xander, a boyfriend that was only mine because I'd agreed to accept his money?
    It was only a matter of time until I'd go back to being the black sheep. Hopeless and disappointing. Poor little Penelope.
    I sprang from the stool when they called my order, swallowing my tears. I balanced the tray of food, pumping ketchup into the tiny container and grabbing condiments. I breathed deep and exhaled. I always told my students to assess the situation and if they could change the outcome, do their part...and if not, let it go.
    I decided I had to adjust my expectations. I'd been searching for a mom that never existed. This woman was the mom I had. That would either be enough, or it wouldn't. That realization made the walk back to the table easier, but the heaviness in my chest didn't go away.
    She eyeballed the tray like she could feel the pounds glomming to her perfectly maintained body just from being within arm’s reach. “That is quite the burger.”
    I slumped on the stool beside her, all the fight in me gone. “If you don't want to eat it, I won't force feed you. Just let me grab a couple of bites and we can bag it up and head to Westfield-” I stopped talking when I watched her pick hers up with all the finesse of a model being directed toward that perfect shot. She opened her mouth and took a big bite, quickly swiping her mouth as she chewed it slowly.
    “Not bad.” She lowered it back to the plate like a judge on some cooking show. “I'll have to do an extra hour on the elliptical of course, but no pain, no gain, as they say.”
    I knew it was just one bite, and she still didn't respect my career choices, or the me I was struggling to be, but it was a baby step.
    I took a bite of my burger and swallowed it along with my resentment. I dabbed my mouth with the napkin and answered her question. “Yes, Xander will be at the wedding.”
    She practically squealed with glee. “How wonderful!” She leaned in close, her signature perfume wafting in my direction. “Hopefully your wedding bells aren't far behind!”
    I could have easily been annoyed, but I just laughed. I knew that she loved me the only way she knew how. Someday, I hoped it would be enough.

Chapter Four: Xander
    P enny was coming over for dinner—and everything had to be perfect.
    I had the cleaning service scrub my already glittering loft from head to toe. Everything from the floor-to-ceiling windows, to the spiral staircase, to the granite countertops glittered and shined. I'd almost called in my buyer for a few last minute pieces to make it look a little less like a bachelor pad and a little more homey, but that seemed like a bit much. I was going to ask Penny to date me, minus the price tag. That meant she was signing up for me, not the me I wanted to portray to the world. She needed to know who I was.
    And the fact was, I spent so much time living out of a suitcase that my space, while beautiful, was pretty minimalist. It was a two level apartment with an incredible view of the downtown San Francisco skyline. From the door, you were hit by a chef's kitchen that I rarely used, except for a quick bowl of cereal here and there, and a blender that made a mean protein shake. Hardwood floors ran throughout, creating a rustic feel that contrasted with chrome appliances and the exposed beams of the historic building. The living space downstairs was filled with an untouched