Beauty for ashes: receiving emotional healing Read Online Free PDF

staying away from things that could render me dependent upon them.
    I took diet pills once because I was always about twenty- five pounds overweight. Although a doctor prescribed them for me, they made me high. They were amphetamines, but I had no idea they were harmful. I loved the way they made me feel all day! When I was on them, I could work like a machine, clean house, be creative and friendly; I was up, up, up. But when they wore off, I was worn out!
    Although I did not lose any weight, the pills did take care of my appetite-until they wore off. I would not eat all day, but at night I would feel so down that I would make up for what I had missed throughout the day. I remember debating about whether I should get the prescription refilled, but Iknewinside that I would get addicted to the pills if I kept taking them, so I just quit.
    I realize now that the ability to avoid things that could have destroyed me came as a result of having received Jesus when I was nine years old. Even though I did not know how to
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    develop a real relationship with the Lord, He was always with me and was helping me in ways I did not recognize at the time for lack of knowledge. Years later, these blessings were made clear to me.I know that God's grace and mercy kept me from serious problems such as crime, drugs, alcoholism, and prostitution. I am grateful to the Lord and still in awe of how He kept me. Although I did not have those kinds of problems, I had plenty of others. Bad roots had caused my bad fruit.
    Pretending
    I was so miserable and unhappy. Yet, like so many people, I pretended that everything was fine. We human beings pretend for the benefit of others, not wanting them to know about our misery, but we also pretend for ourselves so that we do not have to face and deal with difficult issues.
    I do not think, I ever realized just how miserable I really was until I had spent some time in the Word of God and had begun to experience some emotional healing. If a person has never known true happiness, how can he know what he is missing? I do not remember ever being fully relaxed and truly happy as a child. I do not believe that anyone can enjoy life while living in constant fear.
    I recall Dave talking about his childhood one evening after we were married. He grew up with seven brothers and sisters. They had so much love in their home and a lot of fun as children. Their summers were spent in the country with picnics, ball games, friends, and a Christian mother who played with them and taught them about Jesus. They did not have much money because Dave's father had died from liver disease brought on by alcoholism. Yet the influence, prayers, and Christian example of Dave's mother kept the family out of
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    trouble.They had love, which is what all of us need and are actually created for.As Dave shared with me that evening about all the good times he and his family had and how much he enjoyed his youthful years, I suddenly had a realization that I did not like. I could never, ever remember being happy as a child! Something had been stolen from me that I could never get back. I felt terribly cheated. Perhaps you feel the same way. If so, God will do for you what He has done for me. He will make it up to you. He will, Himself, be your reward and will recompense you for what you have lost.
    I realized that I had to stop pretending and face the truth. I had some addictive behaviors from my past. That past was not Dave's fault, nor my children's fault. It was unfair to continue making them suffer for something in which they had had no part.
    Addictive Behaviors
    Addictive behaviors that can develop from abuse are probably endless, but here is a partial list:
    ?Substance abuse
    Alcohol
    Drugs (illegal and prescription) ?Monetary obsessions
    Excessive spending
    Hoarding ?Food disorders
    Bulimia (binge-purge)
    Anorexia (self-starvation)
    Obesity caused by gluttony
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    Note: Some people who have been promiscuous stay overweight on purpose in order