Asher Read Online Free PDF Page B

open. “What?”
    “That boy is hot. And he wants you.”
    “No, he doesn’t. He never has.”
    And that’s that as far as I’m concerned. I’m not falling into that trap again.

    ***

    Fall rolls into winter seamlessly, the sky growing darker, the nights longer. Thanksgiving break comes, and everyone drives home to their families.
    My mom’s busy working on one project or another, as usual. We never celebrated much after the accident. It’s as if happiness left with my dad and all that’s left is work and emptiness.
    Everything comes and goes—joy, love, life—in an endless tide, leaving dead things behind. I can’t let myself get caught in the wave again.
    So I throw myself into my studies, avoiding parties and cafes a certain someone might frequent. Dylan calls quite a few times and Tessa tries all her tricks to bring me “out of my shell” as she puts it, including inviting me to a chocolate fondue evening at her favorite cafe. What can I say, I’m a sucker for chocolate in all forms.
    Chocolate and bad boys.
    But I love my shell. My cozy little world where I can forget the past and dream of a future without haunting memories and the pain they bring.
    I’m happy in my own way. A bit bored and lonely sometimes. But safe.
    It’s not exactly what I hoped for when I came back to Madison. I wanted to meet new people and have fun. But the trade off—boredom for a measure of calm—seems a fair one.
    So okay, maybe my reaction is a bit extreme. Hiding from everyone, cowering. The thing is, I don’t really hate Ash. He makes me feel—too many conflicting things, things I’m not yet prepared to face.
    It never crosses my mind that I’ll be wrenched out of my shell so violently.
    Today it’s Monday, and I should know on Mondays Murphy’s Law is in full force. But I’m not thinking about that. I’m walking to the bus stop after a late biology class. I don’t like walking alone through this part of the campus; it’s dark and deserted, but I’ve successfully managed to push my old friends away with my voluntary solitary confinement, and my mind is on an essay I have to turn in tomorrow.
    I just need to catch the bus, get home and bury myself in the paper I’m writing, curled up on my sofa with a hot cup of cocoa. I’ll also call my mom.
    That’s what my social life has been reduced to.
    God, that’s so lame. I should apologize to Tessa for disappearing and ask her to go out for drinks on Saturday. I need to get my head straight, and running can’t always protect me. I’ve been facing my memories for years now. Facing Ash shouldn’t be this hard.
    The frigid wind whistles in my ears. I resettle the strap of my bag over my shoulder, rub my hands up and down my arms and wish I’d worn a thicker sweater under my coat, and gloves.
    I hear a sound over the wind and turn. Two guys are walking toward me. The few lampposts along the path don’t let me see them clearly. They wear hoodies and their faces are in shadow.
    Walking faster, the wind whipping my long hair across my face, I hurry toward the bus stop. I refuse to listen to the little panicky voice in my head telling me I’m alone out here with not even pepper spray or anyone in sight.
    The footsteps behind me turn quicker—and then even quicker.
    Crap. Lights beckon to my right—a cafe. I turn and bolt that way. It isn’t far. I can make it.
    Only problem is, I’m not prepared for running - not in the dark and even less in high heels. A dip in the concrete is enough to bring me down. I fall like a stone. Throwing my hands forward, I manage to avoid faceplanting, but my palms and then my elbows take the brunt of the impact. Pain shoots up to my arm sockets.
    I lie there on my stomach, in a daze, propped on my stinging elbows, staring at the ground an inch from my nose. Fire spikes up from my ankle, the pain so sharp it brings tears to my eyes.
    Oh god, I must have sprained it.
    Fear rolls in a great dark wave. I twist my head, trying to see if