Adventures in Funeral Crashing Read Online Free PDF

“Yeah.”
    “Okay, good night then, Kait,” Anne waved, as
she walked to her car.
    “Good night,” I managed as I pretended to
walk to mine, as Anne got into her car and drove away.
    I watched her car speed down the road and had
a brief thought that I could just drive away too. It was an option,
but not the one I was going to take. I may have been a social
outcast, but I was going to face Ethan like a man, well, a woman in
my case. Besides, I knew Ethan would find me at school tomorrow
anyway if I didn’t talk to him. He already stalked me down at work.
And, school could be worse. I could just see Ariel joining in on
the conversation and emphasizing my freaky qualities. She’d
probably even bring her friends Megan and Sarah. It made one
shudder. Ariel was worse than any horror movie monster, including
Freddy Krueger from Nightmare on Elm Street .
    I scanned the surrounding street and saw
Ethan sitting in a silvery blue Honda Civic Hybrid just next to the
parking lot, staring at me. I was only a few feet away from escape
and my car, but I forced myself to walk toward the Civic
instead.
    “Hey,” I tried to say casually as I opened
his car door and sat down in the passenger seat, but all I think I
got out was a mumble.
    I couldn’t get over the fact that I was
sitting in Ethan Ripley’s car. I mean, it was a totally normal,
boring car interior, but yet it felt like such an amazing place.
That might have a lot to do with the fact that it was Ethan’s and
that he was only sitting inches away from me. Focus, focus, I told
myself.
    “Hey,” he said in response, so I guess my
mumble did come out coherent. “So? What’s the story?”
    I gulped. This was it. Panic seized my chest.
I couldn’t even enjoy being in a car with Ethan Ripley, I was so
nervous. This could be the closest I ever got to him. The best two
minutes ever! Or, at least from high school. But no, I was too busy
freaking out to enjoy it.
    I just had to do it. It was like tearing off
a band-aid. I sighed, held my breath, and just said it, “I was
funeral crashing.”
    “What?” Ethan looked totally puzzled.
“What?”
    “I was funeral crashing,” I explained, “I saw
the obituary in the paper and I thought I would go.”
    “So you didn’t know Liz?” Ethan asked.
    I shook my head, feeling mortified. “No.”
    Ethan raised his eyebrows, “Really?”
    I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.
Don’t cry, I told myself. “No, I didn’t know her. I was just there
for the funeral. I didn’t mean anything by it. I’m sorry. She
seemed cool. It’s really sad.”
    “That’s weird,” Ethan said and I felt my
heart sink at the judgment I could hear in his voice. “Why would
you want to crash a funeral?”
    “I…” I started. It was a question that I had
been asked before, first by my dad and then Ariel. In a rare moment
of distraught weakness, I had actually confided in her even though
we had stopped being friends. It had been a total mistake.
Regardless, I still hadn’t come up with a good answer to that
question, except for the truth. “I like them.”
    “What?” Ethan looked utterly confused. “You
like funerals? Why? They’re depressing as fuck.”
    As I watched Ethan run his hand through his
silky hair in frustration, I fought a girlish sigh and tried to
explain something that I didn’t know how to explain, “They can be.
They can definitely be the worst moment of your life, but there’s
something really amazing about them too.”
    “Like what?” Ethan demanded. I finally got a
good look at him and yes, he was super hot and only inches away
from me, but I could also see the desperate grief in his eyes.
    I looked away from his eyes, “Like how
everyone remembers the person that died and not just remembers -
there are some great stories, really great stories. Stories that
even if you knew the person well, you might never have heard of
that story. And, everyone with all these great stories about this
person that they have