Wicked Hearts Read Online Free PDF Page A

real man inside.
    “It was a dumb ass thing to do. The irony is, I meant what I said. I really do want to
    meet someone like you. Someone who isn"t just out for what they can get. I shouldn"t
    have lied to you. I apologize. Truly.”
    Reese bit his lip and looked away, though not before Jeff saw the shame wash over
    his face. His heart thawed a little more, though a small voice in his head warned him
    this could just be another in a series of ploys.
    “Why me, Reese? I mean, c-c-come on.” Jeff paused, refusing to stutter, not now. He
    took a long, cleansing breath and pushed on. “Why focus on me, of all people, the geek,
    the loser?”

    The look of genuine surprise on Reese"s face almost made Jeff laugh and yet
    another layer of ice melted around his heart. Could Reese really be that good an actor,
    or was he actually sincere?
    “Are you fucking kidding me?” Reese emphatically asserted. “Loser! No way!
    You"re a fucking MIT graduate. You"re brilliant. I"ve always been attracted to smart
    men. It"s like an aphrodisiac to me. But it"s more than that, Jeff.” Gently he squeezed
    Jeff"s leg, his expression so utterly sincere Jeff finally knew he must be telling the truth.
    In a quiet voice that radiated with muted intensity, Reese continued. “There"s
    something about you. Something I want to explore. I can see the pain in your eyes.
    What happened to hurt you? How can I fix the hurt? How can I make it better?”
    Jeff sat stunned. How had he known? Jeff never spoke about it, not to anyone. Tom
    Shepherd had swept into Jeff"s quiet, controlled life as an academic, turning his world
    upside down and completely capturing Jeff"s heart in the process.
    After a whirlwind love affair that lasted only three weeks, Tom left for Africa with a
    group called Volunteers for Peace, promising to return in a month. A month became
    two and then three, during which Jeff learned through the grapevine that the volunteer
    program had long ended. He heard rumors he tried to ignore that Tom had headed off
    to Europe, seen in the company of jetsetters more interested in party life than good
    works.
    When Tom did finally come sweeping back into Jeff"s life, Jeff confronted his lover
    with what he"d heard. But Tom had answers for everything, soothing Jeff"s hurt with an
    onslaught of sexual attention and devotion. Jeff gave in to Tom"s considerable charms.
    Who knows how long he would have labored under the illusion that what they had,
    even if it was temporary, was real?
    It was the night before Tom was to leave, this time for India, with promises he
    would return soon to Jeff"s arms. “Do you have to go,” Jeff said, hating himself even
    before the words were out and angry at Tom for forcing him into the role of pining
    lover.
    Tom had smiled gently, shaking his head. “You know me, Jeff. I"m a gypsy. But
    you"ll be with me, in my heart.” After he made love to Jeff, he sent him away, claiming
    he still had to pack before his early morning departure.
    When Jeff returned later that night, hoping to surprise Tom with a new backpack
    for his trip, the lights were out in Tom"s studio apartment. Not wanting to disturb him,
    Jeff started to leave the backpack beside the front door, a note wishing Tom a good trip
    tucked inside. It was then he saw the door was ajar. Surprised, he pushed it, causing it
    to swing open.
    Inside he could hear whispering and muted laughter. Confused, he stepped inside.
    The laughter turned to groans and sighs, accompanied by the creak of bedsprings. Jeff

    stood rooted to the spot, a dawning horror washing over him as he realized what he
    was hearing.
    The next morning when Tom appeared at Jeff"s graduate housing to say goodbye,
    Jeff had meant to say nothing. He would just let Tom go and forget about him. But
    when Tom reached for him, Jeff found himself blurting, “Are you sure you"re in the
    right place? Shouldn"t you be with whoever you were fucking last night?”
    Instead of denying it or at least having the