When Hari Met His Saali Read Online Free PDF

as she headed home. She was looking forward to tonight. It was Wednesday Bollywood night!
    Meanwhile
    Hariprasad Malhotra was running late as usual and still had to make one stop before meeting up with Tia at her place in Santa Monica. He was excited about their Wednesday Bollywood night as he knew it was important to her. He endured the often-horrific Bollywood/Hollywood romcoms because they were followed by “anything goes” lovemaking. Tia explicitly barred Hari from referring to their lovemaking as S-E-X. She rarely said the word and often spelt it out as if an impressionable child was in the room.
    Hari was as far removed from Bollywood films as a condom is removed from an Indian female’s life — which is to say Indian women do not like talking, hearing, looking at, or touching a condom. It was a man’s job. Tia was no different. She hated them as objects although she loved their functionality and the fact that she was not the one who had to be responsible for them … or wear them … or purchase them. Ever. That convenient little fact, she loved.
    Hari digressed a lot. He remembered having a condom talk with Tia, which had led to him accusing her of leading her life as if it were a Bollywood movie. He had wondered out loud why a woman who had spent so much time and effort getting as far away from India as Tia had would enjoy watching “dumb Bollywood” movies? Tia had pondered on the question before claiming that Bollywood films were the only things that connected her to India. That, and the fact that being able to spy on other people’s stories as a mere spectator, was a bonus. There was an innocence to the stories in those films, she said, but that sounded like a bunch of bull feces to Hari.
    It was an ongoing thing between them, and tonight he had to sit through yet another one of those films before their lovemaking could start. That was the hook. He was excited about
that.
Hari had a talent for turning anything into S-E-X talk. For example, if Tia had cooked something nice for him, he was likely to compliment her by saying something like:
    ‘This is so good, I guarantee you that this dish is used for or during S-E-X in some culture somewhere.’
    Ewee.
The scary thing for Tia was that Hari would believe it, too.
    So tonight,
that
was what had brought Hari to the biggest adult toy store in Los Angeles: Larry Flynt’s HUSTLER — a supermarket for adult indulgence; a Disneyland for the more adventurous in the bedroom; a NASA-like place with cutting edge technology — all dedicated to the … well, you get the idea.
    As Hari had seen the film
The People vs. Larry Flynt
, and as a budding entrepreneur himself, he was inspired by the audacity of this man and what he had achieved in his lifetime. Larry Flynt had had a very humble start with a single porn magazine, which he eventually built into a billion-dollar company. At the time, no one would’ve imagined porn could be a billion-dollar industry. In those days, that kind of thing only happened in America.
    Hari was not in the porn business. He was the owner of a much more respectable start-up designing games and applications for mobiles and tablets. The company was not profitable yet, but Hari was hoping that soon he would become one of the industry’s big players. He fancied himself as a serial entrepreneur. In reality, that was only because he had failed in many of his earlier business ventures at least earnestly earning him the “serial” tag. The entrepreneur part was still debatable. But he was naturally curious. He was an avid reader, not of books but general trivia that he found mostly on the Net. Hari believed he could get the next big game or app idea by accumulating trivia. He had read somewhere that the most popular mobile games originated from useless trivia and he was convinced he too would find his rock star game by trawling through useless information.
    His Galaxy Note II pinged right at that moment. Hari had subscribed to all kinds of