What's a Girl Gotta Do? Read Online Free PDF Page A

time…”
    Don’t I?
    â€œSometimes you need to just let things go. To know when it’s not worth the trouble. To protect yourself.”
    But who will protect people weaker than me?
    I shrugged again. Knowing I didn’t quite know what I felt yet, that I was only on the cusp of it.
    â€œWhat are we going to do about Megan?” I asked.
    Amber’s face scrunched up. “How was she?”
    â€œShe was…okay. Well, that’s what she kept saying. It was clear she didn’t want to talk about it. I thought maybe we could try and include her in more stuff? Get to know her better.”
    Evie nodded. “That’s a good idea. To invite her to more things… She doesn’t seem to have anyone she really hangs around with since Max. I still can’t believe it though. I mean, Max seems so nice!”
    â€œThat means nothing though,” Amber said. “You never know what goes on in people’s relationships behind closed doors. Besides, we can’t jump to conclusions about what happened between them. We have to let Megan tell us in her own time, if at all.”
    â€œI know something terrible happened.” I shook my head. “It was all over her body language, the way she held herself.”
    We sat there quietly, all of us depressed in our own ways. My brain was on a loop – playing the day over.
    Amber stood up.
    â€œAmber, you are standing up,” I said.
    â€œThat I am.”
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œBecause I’m going to dance to Joan Jett.”
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œBecause we need cheering up.”
    And, before I had time to compute, she’d put “Bad Reputation” on her phone and started dancing like a maniac.
    Amber doesn’t dance often. She is just under six foot, and all big of hair, so she’s usually too self-conscious. But when she does, it is a sight of a sight to be seen. She flailed her limbs in the air, she attempted to shimmy, she pogoed up and down.
    â€œAre you guys going to join in?” she puffed. “Or just watch me here making a huge tit out of myself?”
    Evie and I gave each other a look, then got up and joined her. Evie – all short and curvy – wiggled her shoulders and twisted herself in circles. I waved my hands over my head, grabbing Amber’s hands so we could twirl. They laughed and I smiled, and the beat of Joan Jett flowed through me and helped a little. But not as much as I needed it to.
    â€œSee!” Amber yelled over the music. “There are some days you can fight, and there are other days when all you can do is pretend none of it is happening and dance and laugh and dance.”
    I twirled her under my arm again, still smiling, but my unusual bad mood wasn’t shifting.
    All I could think was, But, while we’re dancing, what unspeakably bad things are happening outside of this bubble?

six
    My parents were waiting for me when I got home. Sitting patiently, the very painting of serene. Though I could see Dad’s inner turmoil from a mile off and knew Mum must’ve given him a talking to.
    Mum stood up to hug me. “Lottie, honey. You’re home.”
    I stepped through the annoying beaded curtain and made myself hug her back.
    â€œHi,” I said, preparing for them to kill me with kindness – their favourite trick.
    Dad sipped on his herbal tea, his lips all pursed, but he stood and hugged me too when Mum gave him a nod.
    We were a family of huggers. Well, Mum was. Dad and I never had much say in the matter.
    Dad pointed to a chair next to him. “Come, sit.”
    It was like we’d never argued – which is how he always played it. Anger and strictness followed by niceness and we’re-only-doing-it-for-your-own-good .
    â€œYou want a cup of tea?”
    I nodded. “Do we have any of the special flowering ones of Mum’s left?”
    Dad pulled one out of the special pot we had for them on the tea tray. He poured hot