Waking Up Read Online Free PDF Page A

 Feel free to cripple me anytime, babe.”  Alex gives one of his famous belly laughs and kisses me thoroughly before standing me up so we can shower off.  This man always makes me feel so loved.
    I slam back into reality and realize I’m standing in the middle of the shower staring at the seat like it’s going to jump up and bite me.  “Shit”.  I quickly get back to showering so I can escape the newest memory and get ready for grocery shopping.  I really want to try to have a good night with my friends.  I may not have many more of them.  “Alex, I need every part of this house to stop being a memory of you.”  And I mean that.  Looking back at the seat, I’m slammed with the memories of the many other ways Alex had crippled me on that seat and it nearly drops me to my knees.  
    Turning off the water, I reach for my towel with shaking hands.  Another shower has turned into an anxiety attack.  My breathing is heavy.  If I don’t calm down soon, I’m afraid I may pass out.  Count to ten, Adri.  Breathe in and out slowly.  God help me.
     Calm. The. Hell. Down.
    Out of the corner of my eye, I see the urinal that Alex was so determined he had to have in his “kingdom” bathroom.  Laughter explodes from my chest.  Before I know it, I’m on my backside staring at the urinal laughing so hard tears are pouring down my cheeks, snorts flying from my lips… anxiety attack forgotten.  “This is why I love you so much, Alex.  A simple pisser makes it all better.  If only for a little while.  I miss you so much.  Happy Birthday, baby.  Bet you thought I forgot.”  Standing up, I towel off and head for my closet.
    “Okay, what to wear today.  If Alahna were here, what would she pick out,” I ask myself with a smirk.  “Oh yeah, this is perfect.  She hasn’t seen this one yet and will be so jealous she doesn’t have it.”  I giggle to myself as I slip on my t-shirt, looking in the mirror it reads Save Chase.   Turning around, I giggle again as I can barely make out He’s A Dying Breed.   Man, I love that book-even though I know how it will end-it makes me cry every damn time.  “I swear, one of these times it will all be a dream.  Harper will wake up and it will all be a dream.”  I giggle again at my blabbering.  It’s such a bad habit, but I’ve been this way since I was a kid and I’m not about to change now.  Throwing on some cute butt-hugging denim shorts and black flip flops, I head back to the bathroom to slap on a little make up and dry my hair.
    “Girl, you need some concealer under those eyes.  You look like a damn bag lady with what you got going on under there.”  Chuckling at my own joke, I make quick work of my simple make up job and dry my hair till it isn’t dripping.  I don’t care if it isn’t fully dry.  Giving it another brush through, I decide it’s good.  Looking myself over one last time, I figure I don’t look like death anymore and won’t make any little kids cry.
    Hopping down the stairs, I walk into the kitchen, grab my purse, keys, list, and head for the store.  Time to get the supplies for tonight.  Time to put my happy face on…
     
     

Chapter Four
    Tucker
     
    I wake up confused by my surroundings.  Where the hell am I?  Looking around, I try to orient myself.  I actually slept the night before and after a few nights of not sleeping, it’s got me in a fog.  Rubbing the palm of my hand into my eyes, I try desperately to clear the grime from my thoughts.   Epping.   That’s right.  I’m in some town, city, village maybe?  Wait, they have a Wal-Mart so they are… ah shit.  I don’t know where the hell I am other than Epping, New Hampshire.  I slept good last night.  This bed was comfy-whodathunkit?   Not me.  That’s for damn sure.  When I pulled in I thought I’d be getting bit my bed bugs all night, but it’s a nice little place.  Checked the bed when I got here.  Clean as a whistle.  Shame to leave so