Vintage Whispers (A Cozy Retirement Mystery Book 1) Read Online Free PDF Page A

convertible,” Mary Louise said.
    “I promised it to Zack when he turns sixteen.”
    “He’s twelve,” Opal reminded her.
    “Which means you could’ve driven it for three or four more years,” Mary Louise added, dreading the day when Zack took the wheel.
    “Yes, but then it wouldn’t be in mint condition when Zack gains ownership.”
    “And what does that matter?” Opal asked. “Do you realize how insane it is to give a sixteen year old a Mustang convertible?”
    “You can say that again,” Mary Louise said, certain karma would take their grandson by the hand the very second he obtained his driver’s permit.
    “Speaking of grandkids, I saw you slip something in Catherine’s hand before she left. Did you give my daughter some money for the children?”
    “Ha! Are you kidding me? It was my used tissues.” Mary Louise jiggled her shoulders. Catherine would moan and groan all the way home. Her germ phobia had gotten worse since she’d begun researching Howard Hughes. Mark wasn’t ready to label Catherine as a germaphobe, but just in case, it was a mother-in-law’s duty to do whatever necessary to help with a future diagnosis.
    “And I thought my mother-in-law was terrible.”
    “Which one?” Opal asked.
    “You’re talking about Madge,” Mary Louise said.
    “That would be the one.”
    “But didn’t she pass away right after you married her ‘baby’ boy?” Opal asked.
    “Supposedly. Dead or alive, she left behind quite the problem when she hid the bucket.”
    “You mean kicked,” Opal said.
    “No I had it right the first time. I never believed she drowned. No one else did either. She’d cleared out her bank accounts an hour before her car sailed off the Lickety Split Bridge.”
    Opal gasped. “I’d forgotten all about that.”
    “Poor Old Madge,” Pearl droned. “I couldn’t blame her. She found someone to look after her son and off she went. Why you saw who she left behind! I married a child, not a man. He wanted a mother, not a wife.”
    “Then you should’ve tracked down his momma and given her a full refund. You could’ve thrown in her first grandchild and told her to consider it as interest paid.” Opal grinned. “Nothing against Catherine of course.”
    “Maybe I would’ve if Danny hadn’t died so young. God rest his soul. At least he died by natural causes. When his number was up, he just grabbed his chest and tumbled to the floor. Too bad his cousin Oscar didn’t have the same good fortune.”
    “What do you mean?” Opal asked, sitting upright.
    “You never heard the story?” Pearl lowered her voice. “Why the folks down at the Five and Dime said he suffered somethin’ awful. He was never diagnosed properly but death came for him and got him all the same. Irritability, I think. Lived with it his whole life. Bless his heart.”
    Mary Louise waited for the punch line. When Pearl didn’t add one, she said, “You’re joking. Right?”
    “No.” Pearl replied, shaking her head slowly. “Folks at the Five and Dime claimed that it was a life-ending disorder. He was a grumpy fella. Remember? Anyway, misery loves company and the old coot didn’t have one friend on the face of this earth. Friendship is a basic need, you see. And after suffering from the disease for years and years, he just fell over one day. Dropped dead, they said.” 
    “Maybe it was a heart attack,” Opal suggested.
    “No,” Pearl drawled. “The cause of death was irritability. They even listed it on his death certificate, too. Everybody said so.”
    “And I’m assuming everybody hangs out at the Five and Dime?” Opal asked.
    “That’s right.”
    “He didn’t die of irritability,” Opal argued.
    “Of course he did. I’m acquainted with the family, second cousin by marriage. Duh.”
    Mary Louise and Opal shot one another a knowing stare. They would soon have one of their infamous sit-down talks.
    The duh -days were over.
    Pearl continued babbling about who had said what and how