for the life of me, I could not figure out why she would want to come back. I hung up and walked over to the leather ottoman to sit in front of Lizzie. I put my hands out to hers to gesture that I needed to talk to her. She turned to me and smiled. When she saw my face, the smile vanished.
“Is everything alright?” Lizzie asked dubiously. She put her arms over her knees in a protective hold I had grown accustomed to and looked up to me with a sobering gaze. I darted my eyes around the living room, trying to muster up what I was about to say. How do I start? What word starts off a conversation that you know will end up in a fight? I wished in that moment that she could read my mind and see how hard this was for me. She waved her hand in front of my face and gave me an expectant look.
“Nick, spill!” she demanded. “You are worrying me.”
“Um… remember I told you that Sam went back to Texas?” I looked into her eyes and I could feel my voice actually shaking. “Yeah well, she is back. She just called me from Logan and needs a ride,” I said quietly.
My head was almost turned down in shame. Damn it, I should have told her the day my mother had called and told me that Sam was interested in moving back to Boston. I remember asking her why but she didn’t know. I was so caught up in reveling about Lizzie being pregnant that I dismissed the news, thinking I would have nothing to do with her return. This was so awkward.
“She’s back? Like back back? Wait, why can’t she take a cab? Nick, why is she here?” Lizzie fired off questions in quick succession.
She looked so perplexed and I just wanted to erase that look away with a magic eraser. I shrugged in defeat at the position I have found myself in. I didn’t know the answers. I didn’t know why she came back or why she couldn’t grab a cab. All I knew was that she had been suffering after Conner’s death and she had been my friend since grade school. I did feel obligated to help her in any way I could now that she had called. I couldn’t just leave her there.
“I honestly don’t know, baby. I just want to make sure if it’s alright with you if I go pick her up,” I said, taking her hands into mine.
Lizzie paused for a moment as she looked at me. Lizzie liked to observe behavior more than words. I know that hollow words never did much for her but she once told me that if she knew how to read body language she probably could have saved herself from years of heartache. She had worked on watching people and now had keen sense of knowing when things weren’t right. She didn’t like secrets and quite frankly, neither did I. Sometimes I just couldn’t help the need to protect her. Obviously, I had passed the test. She blinked and smiled half heartedly.
“Yeah, I guess you should go,” she resignedly answered. Panic quickly took over in her face.
“Wait! Is she coming to stay here with us?” She barked out the question.
Lizzie had never met Sam. Lizzie hadn’t known what to think about Sam. She never even knew Sam existed until after Conner died. She had been driving the car the night she struck oncoming traffic that killed her brother. We never talked about her but I was pretty sure Lizzie wasn’t ready to face Sam.
“No, sweetheart.” I rubbed the back of my hand along the side of her beautiful face to take the stress away.
“I believe she has a place all set up. If she doesn’t, I will get her to a hotel. I think she has a job lined up. Listen, I really have no idea what the hell is going on other than an old friend needs a ride,” I replied.
Lizzie kissed Niall’s orange fuzzed head and stood up. She took her long red curls out of an elastic band and immediately popped it back up in a ponytail. She nodded once as to say she was on board. I knew she wasn’t.
“Should I call the order in?” she offered, obviously trying to reel in her feelings. I clearly saw all of the hurt and confusion on her face. Her body language defied
Peter Matthiessen, 1937- Hugo van Lawick