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knot, and a bowline knot.
    I can do all of these faster and better than anyone else.
    Jack was impressed.
    Jack: Wow, Logan. You are our knot expert. Look at this, guys.
    The six other guys, including you-know-whos, looked at me and at my rope.
    Bruce: So what?
    Jack: Bruce, look at your rope and then look at Logan’s. Keep your mouth shut if you can’t back it up.
    Bruce shrugged. He didn’t even get the clove hitch, let alone the prussic.
    That day was probably the best in Scouts.
    And it was in the beginning.
    Like our second pack meeting, so Jack thought I was pretty smart and maybe a good Scout. I was glad because I thought that might keep Bruce and them away from me.
    But Jack liking me didn’t really last.
    Bruce is too smart for that.

    I couldn’t believe it.
    Dr. Benson in the Towers was a trap.
    After Mom went in there for a while and I had been sitting there staring at fish because
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sucked, Dr. Jim Benson came out and said: Logan, why don’t you come join us.
    The room was like this:
    A big window with a view of the mountains.
    A big desk with everything set out on it very even.
    A chair for the doctor that was like what you’d think.
    Two leather chairs and one my mom was in.
    A couch over by another door that was maybe for a bathroom.
    Pictures of smiling dogs and kids and Ansel Adams photos all over.
    Books.
    I sat down.
    Dr. Benson: Logan, do you know why you are here?
    Me: No.
    Dr. Benson: Okay. That’s what your mother told me.
    Me:
    Dr. Benson: I’m a counselor.
    Me:
    Dr. Benson: Your parents thought it’d be a good idea if you and I talked now and then.
    Me:
    No way no way no way no way no way no way no way no way no way no way
    Dr. Benson: Would that be okay with you?
    I looked at my mom. She nodded and smiled.
    Unbelievable.
    Dr. Benson: It’s your turn to talk now, Logan.
    Me:
    Mom: Honey, it’s okay.
    Me:
    I had to get out of there.
    Mom: Honey?
    She was staring at me and tried to take my hand. I moved away.
    Me:
    Dr. Benson: You know what? It’s okay. You don’t have to talk this first time.
    Me:
    Dr. Benson: How about I’ll just talk.
    And then he stared at me and stared at me and then finally
    Dr. Benson: My name is Dr. Jim Benson and I am forty-eight years old. I have three children and I love baseball and eating. I also like to go boating. Have you ever been boating before, Logan?
    Unbelievable.
    Mom: Umm, no. We don’t have a boat or anything. But he has been down a river before, haven’t you, Logan?

    That’s when I got up and walked out. I just walked out.
    I didn’t stop in the waiting room either. I didn’t stop in the hall. I didn’t stop down in the lobby. I didn’t even stop at the car. I just kept going. But soon I was running. I sort of ran up the hill.

    A hill.
    I didn’t know where I was exactly except that we were by the university, but it didn’t matter. I ran up a hill and there was a construction site there and a bunch of guys jackhammering.
    I ran past them.
    I felt stupid for all of them to see me running but I didn’t stop.
    I kept running and panting and almost dying until I passed them and got to the base of the mountain. I can’t really describe where I was or what it was like because I didn’t know and I was about to pass out.
    All I know was that all of a sudden I was at the base of the mountains where the trails start and I sat down by a tree where no one was around and no one could see me from the road.
    I sat down and then
    I yelled.

    Laurel is pretty funny in class.
    She doesn’t really say things but she laughs at weird times and sometimes she hums.
    Everyone will look at her but she just keeps humming.
    Girls like Carmen and Vanessa and Mallory think she’s “super dorky.”
    I know because I heard them say that — “super dorky.”
    I don’t know why she does all that weird stuff, but I think she’s funny.

    Here’s how Zyler was: Brave.
    Brave like once, when we didn’t even know where his dad was, Zyler started the