sound of feet hitting concrete as they walked in the otherwise silence of the hall reached me. It was Ms. Edith’s personal guards. I knew the visitor today would pique the Dark Walker’s interest. A sickness that had been building exploded in my stomach as I heard them getting closer.
I always prayed I was wrong, that they’d walk past, but the footsteps were always followed by the sound of a key in the lock. They opened the door to my room and stood there. They didn’t need to say anything and I didn’t fight them. I got up from my bed without any hint of how I dreaded what was to come, shoulders square.
We walked down the corridor, one guard in front of me and one behind. I didn’t know their names. Her guards didn’t last too long. I wasn’t sure what happened to them and didn’t really care either. They only had one work detail and that was handling the Dark Walker’s business.
I used to resist but it hadn’t made any difference. I actually thought some of the guards enjoyed the struggle. I hadn’t for the last year, not since it had dawned on me that as much as I dreaded what was to come, my opportunity to escape might also lie in these moments.
The less I fought, the more and more lax they were becoming. One of these times, I’d get my opening.
We walked across the compound through the maze of halls and I was always amazed in these moments just how massive this place really was, what lay down some of these other hallways. We made it to the other side of the building to a set of doors that led to her dominion.
This was where the bile would start to rise in my throat, not that I’d let on to the guards. No matter how many times I’d been through this, I still dreaded it. When I was being honest about it, I knew it was fear I felt. I might have hated that most of all, being afraid. No matter how I tried to talk myself down in my head, diminish it as just a short period of pain, I could never totally get rid of the feelings.
The guard in front opened the doors and we walked through into the part of the compound that was off limits to most. I heard the guard behind me lock them after us.
This was when it got the toughest. When I wanted to turn to them and beg them to let me leave. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop the words that wanted to come.
I’d done it when I was younger. Begged. Groveled. Humiliated myself to them, on my knees with a mixture of tears and snot running down my face.
It hadn’t mattered. Had somehow made it worse afterward. Now it wasn’t just the pain I faced when I came here but humiliation as well. I’d always remember how pathetic I’d been. I’ve heard pride is a sin. In my book, begging is worse.
But that was a long time ago. I hadn’t begged for help in years and wouldn’t. It didn’t matter what they did to me. I could get past the pain but I’d never forget grabbing on to a guard’s leg and the embarrassment of getting backhanded for messing his pants with a mixture of my tears and snot. Or the laughter that followed when I’d peed myself in fear.
We came to the room, the heavy metal door gliding open silently. This one was always well oiled. A single wooden chair sat in the center with straps attached to it. It reminded me of the electric chair I remembered seeing a picture of once.
I wasn’t the first Plaguer to sit in this chair. I knew they’d killed my kind here. Some of the guards talked, especially to the girls they were sleeping with. Ben, Margo’s guard, had even warned her in a weak moment. He’d said to tell me to give them whatever they wanted when they brought me here. That they’d kill me if I didn’t.
He was wrong. I’d already be dead.
I crossed to it of my own accord and sat in the chair, not fussing at all as they bound my wrists and legs with thick leather straps with buckles. This was where the Dark Walker would interrogate me.
I’d endure what was to come and I’d survive it. Hopefully, an opportunity might present itself
David Stuckler Sanjay Basu
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