The Widower's Tale Read Online Free PDF Page B

first dormitory rooms, and a small, struggling cinema with third-run movies and lumpy velvet chairs from which the occasional spring protrudes to rip an unmendable hole in your trousers.
    But TGO, as it's known, is one of my favorite stores, because it's bright, filled with unpretentious useful things (from long johns to snowshoes), and still run by the family that founded it sometime around the Great Depression.
    My mission that day was to procure the swimming trunks with which I had promised Clover I would henceforth gird up my loins. I must have looked a little lost as I ran my hand through a rack of repellently slinky, skimpy garments, because a young woman came over and asked if I needed help.
    "Let's see," I said. "If you have access to a time machine that could transport me back to an era when men wore bathing suits that actually concealed something, the answer would be yes."
    She laughed. "Oh, these are just the Speedos."
    "As opposed to the Slomos?"
    She laughed again, her amusement genuine. I felt pleased with my sly little quip. "That's very funny," she said. "But follow me."
    For the second time that day, an attractive woman was leading me forward toward the future. This one took me all the way across the store, through aisles filled with clothing for climatic conditions at the opposite end of the seasonal spectrum. TGO was not air-conditioned, and I began to perspire at the mere sight of all that fleece and flannel.
    "Here are the more traditional trunks," she said when we reached a rack near the fitting rooms. "There's not a lot left, I'm afraid. But all the swimwear's half off now."
    "Doesn't anyone get a yen for a new suit in the midst of a heat wave like this? And do you honestly believe that someone's going to purchase anything made of suede?" I pointed to a row of jackets lined with sheepskin.
    "The world is a strange and often illogical place," said the young woman. "The answer to both of those questions would be yes."
    This was not your typical sales gal.
    I turned my attention to the three swimsuits left in my size. At least they were cut to my expectations--and dirt cheap--but there was nothing subdued or solid. Two were faux Hawaiian, the third printed with a madras plaid I associate with people who join country clubs. I pulled out the two Hawaiians.
    "Well!" I turned toward a full-length mirror outside the fitting booths.
    "Don't you want to try them on?" asked my handmaiden.
    "Not necessary. But lend me your opinion."
    With a comic flourish, I struck what I imagined to be a surfing pose, legs akimbo, knees bent. Waistband stretched between my thumbs, I held one and then the other suit in front of me. "Devil? Or the deep blue sea? Pull no punches."
    She stood back and narrowed her eyes. I noticed that she did not look like one of the freckled Irish wives from the large family that usually staffed the store. She was about Clover's age, deeply tanned, and her hair was strikingly dark. I wondered if she cared that anyone could see it was dyed.
    "Hmm," she said. "The pink pineapples would be a daring choice. You would turn heads in that one.... The hula girls are actually more conventional."
    The pink pineapples (depicted on an aqua background) were indeed quite gaudy but ornamented a suit with a longer cut. Perhaps it would seem irrational to make the demure choice after having swum buck naked for so long, yet such was my preference. "Daring it shall be," I concluded.
    "You won't regret it." My handmaiden held out her hand, and I extended mine to shake it. But she was merely reaching for the hangers.
    "Silly me," I said when our hands collided awkwardly. "I thought I was to receive your congratulations. I will have you know that this is the first swimsuit I have purchased since I was in college."
    "Well then, I'm glad you're headed back to the water," she said.
    I was about to explain my situation to her when I stopped myself. I laughed and shook my head.
    "What's so amusing?" she said.
    "I'm having one