The Twelve Dates of Christmas Read Online Free PDF

some answers from him. But for now, you need to promise me you’re not about to blame yourself.’
    ‘Oh no, he’s the idiot who messed it all up.’ But inside she did feel a bit to blame. She was supposed to bring ‘fun, sexy girlfriend’ to the table yet over the years she’d begun only to bring her doughy tummy and some cracking TV box sets.
    Claudia’s phone tinkled. She met Penny’s eye and warily pulled it from her handbag. She smiled. Nick.
    Fancy a shag now you’re single?
Claudia laughed out loud. Nick was the only one who could say something like that to her and not induce further hysterical crying or livid indignation.
    No thanks, now a lesbian, no boys allowed.
    Fine. Frigid. Let me know when I can come over to Penny’s and stare at your lovely face.
    Claudia walked a little lighter the rest of the way.
    ‘Can you plump it up a bit?’ Penny asked, her arms in the air.
    Claudia boxed the sides of Penny’s stomach until it stuck out at more of a curve, then went back to circling her with duct tape.
    Claudia finished her friend’s faux-pregnancy pillow tummy with a flourish, and Penny added the finishing touch by pulling on a billowy blouse. Penny stroked the pillow and admired herself in the mirror.
    ‘You look so beautiful,’ Claudia smiled, a tear in her eye.
    ‘Thanks, you too.’
    ‘Thanks.’ Claudia squadged her own pillow-baby, which she’d really only fashioned in support of Penny. It felt warm, but other than that she definitely wasn’t ready to be pregnant yet. ‘So, how does that feel? Still want a baby?’
    ‘I love it, Claud, I love it so much I want to name the pillow. I want to name her Katie Rose and go shopping for tiny furry onesies with ears on.’
    Penny was head-over-heels broody for a baby, and at thirty she was over waiting for Mr Right to ride in and play house with her, so she’d chosen to look into the options of having a baby solo. She was bursting at the seams with love, more than enough to equal that of two parents, but she wouldn’t be alone – Claudia would be there.
    ‘If I do go ahead with this, will you come with me to appointments or whatever?’
    ‘Of course I will; I’m going to be your husband for the whole thing. Especially if we get to go to a sperm bank, because I’m gagging to know if they really do have porn mags lying about.’
    ‘I’m not sure if they’d let you look. That might be a different, um, wing than where we’d be going.’
    ‘Okay, I’ll bring my own.’
    ‘Cool. Don’t bring them if we end up going to an adoption agency, though, that might be a bit off.’
    ‘You’re always telling me not to look at porn, you’re such a nagging wife.’
    Penny walked in a circle, holding the small of her back as if the pillow-baby was making it ache. ‘Do you think people will judge me? For not actually being a wife?’
    ‘If they do they’re living in the past, and I’ll give them a good telling off.’
    ‘Well, maybe not for being unmarried, but what about for not doing this with a man?’
    Claudia saw the nervous face of her friend and waddled over to give her a hug, squashing their pillow tummies together. ‘You’ve wanted this for a long time, and if you had a partner I’m sure it would be a great journey together, but you
can
do this yourself. It’s allowed.’
    Penny nodded. ‘You sure you don’t want to get one too? We could be single mums together. Sorry, not to be flippant.’
    ‘It’s fine, but no thanks. With or without Seth, I am soooo not ready.’
    ‘But you’ll hold my hand?’
    ‘Hell, I’ll hold your legs apart in the delivery room if you want.’ She looked down at their pillows. ‘We should totally sumo with these.’
    ‘Let’s do it, but we can’t when I’m actually preggers. Can we?’
    ‘No, probably not. For now, nothing will stop me defeating my non-up-the-duff nemesis.’ She gave Penny a bump with her pillow and sent her flying across the room.
    That night, while Penny danced under the