The Tattooed Heart Read Online Free PDF Page B

“You have. And beyond that, you have earned some affection.”
    Messenger slumped and the defiance was gone from his body language and his tone. “I know you think I’m obsessed.”
    â€œYes,” Daniel said, and smiled sadly. “I wish I could help you.”
    â€œI know that you may not,” Messenger admitted. “And I know that my searches are in vain. I know, Daniel. I know the chances of seeing her, it’s just that . . .”
    â€œThe search has become an expression of faith,” Daniel said.
    â€œMy only faith is in Isthil. And, of course, in her servants.”
    â€œYes, Messenger, I know the correct answer. But the truth is otherwise. Isthil is only your second love. Ariadne is your first. You search for a glimpse of her, knowing how improbable it is, but the act of searchingis, for you, an expression of love.”
    Messenger had nothing to say to that. He hung his head and the two of them stood in silence until Messenger said, “She once told me there were a dozen places she wanted to see before she died. She loved old places, places that were unique, places that seemed to hold a mystique.”
    â€œShe sensed even then the presence of our world,” Daniel said. He emphasized the word our so that there was no doubt he was referring to whatever impossible dimension we occupied. Daniel looked around, saw me, let me know that he had seen me, and said, “She was not mistaken. This place has meaning to the gods.”
    â€œBut she is not here.”
    â€œYou know I cannot answer that.”
    Silence again as Messenger absorbed that answer, and after a moment nodded his acquiescence.
    â€œI do not forbid you, Messenger. Even you are allowed a life, pleasures, as you carry out your destiny. But as a friend, I wonder if you do yourself harm. I wonder if your already burdened heart only becomes heavier.”
    â€œI can’t give up,” Messenger said with a note of helplessness. “That would be despair. That would do morethan burden my heart, it would destroy me.”
    Daniel nodded and smiled wistfully. “Love is a power to equal that of the gods. Your apprentice is with us.”
    Messenger turned his gaze on me, not searching, knowing where I was. “She needed rest. She has seen terrible things.”
    Without willing it, I was with them.
    Daniel said, “You have begun to see the nature of your duty, and the pain it will cause you. But you have not broken.”
    â€œI . . . I didn’t mean to . . .” I was about to say I had not meant to eavesdrop, but of course I had, and there is little point in lying to people who know instantly whether you are speaking truth. “I don’t understand why—”
    â€œYou are not my apprentice,” Daniel said, cutting me off. “I am not your master.”
    With a nod to Messenger he was gone.
    An uncomfortable silence stretched between me and Messenger. Then he took an audible breath and said, “This place is called Parque Lago Azul. It is in Brazil.”
    â€œI recognized it.”
    â€œDid you? Ah.”
    I wanted to ask him about Ariadne. The shadow of Ariadne had been on him since our first encounter and at times his obvious devotion to this girl annoyed me. Oriax would no doubt have some snarky remark to offer on the subject, along with the rude suggestion that I was attracted to Messenger in a most un-apprentice-like way, and thus jealous.
    Was I jealous of Ariadne for being the object of such love? How could I not be? Who does not want to be loved beyond all reason? Who does not want to be needed as Messenger needed his Ariadne?
    For Messenger I felt sadness. He did not speak of his pain, but knowing some small part of what his life had been during his service as Messenger, having touched him for a fleeting second and thus felt viscerally some fraction of what he had felt, I could only be sad.
    But another part of me was jealous in a different way, not