The Spectacular Now Read Online Free PDF Page A

excuses. This is it. Tonight’s the night. You’re getting a girlfriend.”
    “Screw you.”
    “No, really. You think you can third-wheel around with me and Cassidy forever? It’s ridiculous. Come on, get in the car.”
    “Why? What do you have in mind?”
    “Girls, that’s what. They’re everywhere.” I wave my arm toward Twelfth Street. “It’s Friday night, dude. The street is a cornucopia of girls. Every other car you see is full of them. Tall ones, skinny ones, fat ones, big tits, little tits, blondes, brunettes, redheads, wide asses, and asses you can fit in the palm of your hand. And you know what they want? They want a dude, dude. That’s what they want. Now get in the car.”
    “Tits and asses, huh? You’re a real romantic, Sutter. You really are.”
    He may be going all sarcastic on me, but he gets in the car anyway. He knows old Sutter’s got his best interest at heart.
    And the fact is I am a romantic. I am in love with the feminine species. It’s a shame you only get to pick one, but since that’s the rule, I’m very grateful for the one I have, and I want nothing more than for my best buddy to have the same thing.

Chapter 6
    Twelfth Street’s busy tonight. I wasn’t exaggerating either—the girls are out in bold numbers. I’m being picky, though. This is a girl for Ricky after all, the dude I played Justice League with in fifth grade. He had my back then and I’ve got his now.
    “You’re not going to embarrass me, are you?” he asks.
    “When did I ever embarrass you?”
    “Do you really need me to list the times?” He pulls out a blaze and flicks his lighter.
    “Dude, what are you doing?” I’ve got nothing against the weed—I just don’t happen to see it as a good social lubricant.
    “You don’t have to smoke any if you don’t want to,” he says, taking a long drag.
    “Just go easy on it, okay. I don’t want to round up a carful of girls and have you go quiet on me, spiraling off into weird cosmos land and shit.”
    He exhales a rush of smoke. “Don’t worry. I’ll be entertaining.”
    “Yeah, sure. But I don’t know how much girls like talking about the commercialization of God or whatever that was you were going on about last Saturday.”
    “It was, What would happen if they discovered the actual physical existence of God? I mean, there’d probably be this humongous battle over the patent rights. Like this whole competition over whether you should get God on cable or satellite. And then they’d have to launch a marketing plan too. They’d have these commercials: ‘Call today and get God for $19.95 a month. Get the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost bundle for only $24.95!’”
    “Right,” I say, chuckling. “And when you can’t pay your bill they come in and cut off your God connection.”
    “See, dude,” Ricky says. “That’s some entertaining stuff.”
    I have to admit he’s right. “But, still, what you and I find entertaining isn’t necessarily going to cut it with the female kind.”
    “I know that. What do you think, I’m some kind of moron?”
    There’s no time to debate that question. Suddenly, a gigantic SUV loaded with girls draws up beside us. I don’t recognize any of them, but the blonde in back rolls down her window, flashes her tits, and dies laughing.
    Ricky goes, “Dude, did you see that?”
    “Yeah, I saw it. I gave her the thumbs-up.”
    “Well, don’t let them get away. Follow them.”
    “Relax, dude. Those girls aren’t even from around here.”
    “So?”
    “So, we could follow them all night long, but they aren’t going to pull over. You know why a girl like that flashes her tits, don’t you? Because she gets off on thinking guys are churning the chubby to her. Anyway, you need someone more natural.”
    “She looked pretty natural to me.”
    “She had
me-me-me
hair.”
    “I wasn’t looking at her hair, dude.”
    Ricky’s a little put out with me for not following them, but not really. I know him. The only