The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole Read Online Free PDF Page B

amuse people. I might change my mind about becoming a vet and try writing situation comedy for television.
    When the film finished Nigel said, ‘How about a nightcap?’ He went to the bar in the corner of the lounge and he poured us both a stiff whisky and soda. I hadn’t actually tasted whisky before and I never will again. How people can drink it for pleasure I don’t know. If it was in a medicine bottle they would pour it down the sink!
    Don’t remember going to bed, but I must have done because I am sitting up in Nigel’s parents’ bed writing my diary.

Sunday April 12th
    Palm Sunday

    This weekend with Nigel has really opened my eyes! Without knowing it I have been living in poverty for the past fourteen years. I have had to put up withinferior accommodation, lousy food and paltry pocket money. If my father can’t provide a decent standard of living for me on his present salary, then he will just have to start looking for another job. He is always complaining about having to flog electric storage heaters anyway. Nigel’s father has worked like a slave to create a modern environment for
his
family. Perhaps if
my
father had built a formica cocktail bar in the corner of
our
lounge my mother would still be living with us. But oh no. My father actually boasts about our hundred-year-old furniture.
    Yes! Instead of being ashamed of our antiques, he is proud of the clapped-out old rubbish.
    My father should take lessons from Great Literature. Madame Bovary ran away from that idiot Doctor Bovary because he couldn’t supply her needs.

Monday April 13th
    Had a note from Mr Cherry asking me when I can resume my paper round. I sent a note back to say that due to my mother’s desertion I am still in a mental state. This is true. I wore odd socks yesterday without knowing it. One was red and one was green. I must pull myself together. I could end up in a lunatic asylum.

Tuesday April 14th
    Had a postcard from my mother. She has found a flat and she wants me to visit her and Lucas as soon as possible.
    Why can’t my mother write a ktter like any normal person? Why should the postman be able to read my confidential business? Her new address is 79A, President Carter Walk, Sheffield.
    I asked my father if I could go; he said, ‘Yes, providing she sends the train fare’. So I have written a letter asking her to send eleven pounds eighty.

Wednesday April 15th
    Went to the youth club with Nigel. It was dead good. We played ping-pong until the balls cracked. Then we had a go on the football table. I beat Nigel fifty goals to thirteen. Nigel went into a sulk and said that he only lost because his goalkeeper’s legs were stuck on with Sellotape but he was wrong. It was my superior skill that did it.
    A gang of punks passed unkind comments about my flared trousers but Rick Lemon, the youth leader, stepped in and led a discussion on personal taste. We all agreed it should be up to the individual to dress how he or she likes. All the same I think I will ask my father if I can have a new pair of trousers. Not manyfourteen-year-olds wear flared trousers today, and I don’t wish to be conspicuous.
    Barry Kent tried to get in the fire-doors to avoid paying his five-pence subs. But Rick Lemon pushed him back outside into the rain. I was very pleased. I owe Barry Kent two pounds’ menaces money.

Thursday April 16th
    Got a birthday card from my Auntie Susan, two weeks late! She always forgets the right day. My father said that she’s under a lot of pressure because of her job, but I can’t see it myself. I’d have thought that being a prison wardress was dead cushy, it is only locking and unlocking doors after afl. She has sent a present via the GPO so with luck I should get it by Christmas. Ha! Ha!

Friday April 17th
    Good Friday

    Poor Jesus, it must have been dead awful for him. I wouldn’t have had the guts to do it myself.
    The dog has mauled the hot-cross buns; it doesn’t respect any traditions.

Saturday April 18th
    Got