The Second Half Read Online Free PDF

Steig as to when he and the children would be arriving. This was not like him. That thought brought her up short.
    Was it time to start worrying or had she already been worrying and just not aware of it? Worry had dogged her her whole life, as did depression. Perhaps they were both spawn of the same source. Did they come as a package? She had the depression more or less under control. The worry, not so much.
    She’d never been so shocked as when Pastor Oliver preached on worry and used the word anathema . God didn’t just dislike his children worrying, it was anathema to Him. Since then she had come to realize that worry was so sneaky, she could be doing just that and not be aware of it.
    Please, Lord, make me aware of worry before it has me trapped had become a daily prayer. For years she had thought she had mastered that ogre, worry. Then she had to confess the sin of pride, too. Sometimes she felt smashed between the two. Awareness. Life was much easier before she became aware.
    Okay, Lord, I don’t want to worry about Steig, the kids, the celebration, Ken’s retirement, and all the other stuff. I want to trust You. Trust that You have this all under control. That none of what is going on surprises You. Trust, such a big word to have only five letters. She closed her eyes. Lord, I trust You. I trust You, Lord, I trust You, Lord God. She tipped her head back and drew in a deep breath, held it, and let it out slowly. Breathe! That was fast becoming her other favorite word. Trust. Breathe. The two worked together.
    Glancing at the clock, she caught herself up short. Six o’clock. No wonder Ambrose had come in with his suppertime whimper. Ken was always home by five, unless he’d called and she’d not heard.
    She checked her phone and slammed the heel of her hand against her forehead. She’d turned the ringer off so she could concentrate and forgot to turn it back on.
    Ken had called, texted, called, and e-mailed. She flinched and hit the speaker on her iPhone. “Sorry, hon, I’m stuck here for even longer than I thought I would be. How come you’re not answering your phone?”
    She listened to the rest of the messages, each one getting a bit more strained. Hitting reply, she tossed her shoulder-length hair back and waited for his phone to ring. And left a message. “Sorry, I turned off my ringer and forgot to turn it back on. I’ll get on supper now and feed the critters. Totally lost track of time. See you when you get here.”
    She should go back and listen to all his messages, but right now duty called in the form of two four-footed critters who were pacing, glancing over their shoulders to see if she was getting the hint. “I’m coming.”
    Her inner dialogue continued. But what about Steig? Lord, I am trusting You. Learning to trust took moment-by-moment concentration. She flipped her phone on to her music list and sang along with one of the choruses. Anything to keep her mind on track.
    Taking out the pet food, she glanced down to see the two, sitting side by side, both sets of eyes tracking her every move. “Thanks, guys, I so need an audience. Would you like to tell me exactly how to do this, as if I’ve never fixed your supper before?” Ambrose licked his chops, his tail swishing the floor. She set their bowls down, one scoop of canned food on top of kibble, and stepped back. “Okay, you can eat now.” She motioned them forward with her hand.
    After sliding a premade casserole in the oven, she took out the ingredients for a tossed salad, and after tossing that in the bowl, snapped the last of the fresh green beans. All the while she sang along with the music, anything to keep her mind from thinking on Steig and now on Ken, too. Something happened today that he hadn’t expected. When the phone sang his song, “Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring,” she hit the button on the second chord.
    “What’s happening?”
    “I hope to be home in an hour or so…”
    “You can’t talk?”
    “That’s right.