The Same Deep Water Read Online Free PDF Page A

the hip, their relationship intensifying in the short time I’ve known them. Some days I wonder why he doesn’t move in; he’s at the house that often.
    “Yeah, but not just him. We’re catching up with a few friends for dinner.”
    “Thanks, but I’m tired.”
    Jen frowns. “You need to get out more.”
    “So you keep telling me.”
    “That should get you out and about.” Jen points at the fridge. “But you hardly leave the house apart from work so how the hell are you going to go to London?”
    “I’ll work up to that one.” I turn away, irritated by her judgment. I know I need to make more of a life for myself, but I’ve no idea how to start. Focusing on making my mark at work takes up my time, success is important, and if I need to stay late to finish up, I do. A social life can wait.
    With a shouted goodbye, Jen leaves, the door slamming behind her.
    I look at the light blinking on the answer-phone. Why Gran can’t use my mobile number, I don’t know. Erica does, frequently messaging me and we chat daily. She’s concerned, but happier now the new meds are working for me. The dark blanket of sadness has fallen away but the fear is never far, gnawing at the edges of my life, waiting for the chance to slip through.
    Uninspired to cook anything else, I pull out last night’s leftovers from the fridge, and as I heat the lasagne in the microwave, I read through the page again.

 
     
    Chapter Five
     
     
    #1 Get A Tattoo
     
    I don’t know Guy besides the fact he hangs around suicide spots with bunches of flowers. This is enough to put him in the ‘odd’ basket in my head, and despite his outward appearance, I don’t want Guy to know where I live until I know him better. Instead, on the following Saturday morning, we meet at a car park around the corner from the cafe. I spent the last few evenings researching tattoos, and now I have steeled myself to cross the first item off my list.
    Guy’s wearing the same clothes as earlier in the week and is paler, eyes rimmed by red.
    “Late night?” I ask him.
    “Kinda.” He twirls his car keys around his finger before clicking the remote. The lights flash on a sporty red Audi and I stop.
    “That’s your car?”
    “Told you I was loaded.”
    That’s the first truth confirmed and the first of my doubts quashed. Perhaps I need to accept he’s honest. “Where do you work?”
    “I don’t. Get in.”
    People’s ability to silence me with short answers is something I need to get a grip on, and learn to push for answers from them. One of the most irritating things in life is coming up with clever retorts several hours too late.
    “You have a lot of spare time then.”
    He frowns. “Phe. That’s unkind.” I redden and he laughs. “Teasing! I do, but I fill my time with the things I love.”
    “Surfing?”
    “I don’t surf.”
    “But you look like a surfer. And you said you could teach me.”
    “I mean, I don’t surf anymore, a mate got taken by a shark.” Guy opens the door and looks across the black soft top of the car at me.
    “Oh, my God, really? I’m so sorry!” Guy chews on his lip, fighting a smile. “You’re teasing me again, aren’t you?”
    “Yeah. My mission is to teach you not to let people do that. Don’t give people power over you, Phe.” He climbs into the car. “I surf. A lot.”
    When I join him, I’m concerned he’ll put the top down; the summer heat has built over the last few days, a true Perth summer gripping the city.
    “That’s what worries me about surfing. The sharks.” And the water.
    “You’ll be in safe hands with me.” Guy fires up the engine, loud music instantaneously filling the car. When I blink at the volume, he turns the sound down.
    “Why do you want to swim with sharks?” I ask.
    “Why do you want to swim with dolphins?”
    “Because I’ve loved them since I was a little girl, we went to Sea World twice and watched the show. At every performance, the handlers pick kids to feed and pet