The Rules Regarding Gray Read Online Free PDF

like in my mind doesn’t seem the least bit possible, let alone sustainable. Not from my experience anyway.” He took a drink of wine, feeling it burn down his throat and warm his stomach. It was an oddly intimate conversation, and perhaps it was the wine or perhaps it was just her interest, but he wanted to have this conversation.
    When he glanced to the head of the table, Ian was lounged back in his chair with his hands on the back of his head, watching them. He was smiling subtly as his eyes moved back and forth. Jasper’s attention shifted back to Gray quickly.
    She bit her lip, not seductively, but as though she were contemplating saying something more. And then she did. “What does it look like in your mind—this closeness?”
    He took a big drink of wine then, and he let his attention wander to the lit up water in the pool beyond Gray. By the time he looked back to her, he was committed to responding honestly, even though he wasn’t at all sure it would make sense.
    “I guess real closeness comes when you find that person that can…” He shook his head, trying to figure out a way to explain it. “…break the hold your darkness sometimes has on you. They liberate you. I don’t know if that makes sense.”
    She nodded. “It makes perfect sense. They erase the ugly or maybe they just make you feel okay about the ugly.” She smiled.
    “Yeah,” he agreed. “Okay, what about you?”
    Now it was her turn to think, and she did. Her expression was nearly whimsical—like life and this topic intrigued her more than terrified her. He wished he could say the same. She was enjoying this … delving, and he was enjoying how open it left him feeling—comfortable in his own skin even.
    “Do you ever feel like there are pieces of you missing? Or your life is just unsatisfying, empty, boring even.” Her voice was quiet, but she still had that light in her eyes. She wasn’t afraid of this, and that kind of amazed him.
    “Yes,” he said quietly. He absolutely understood that feeling.
    “I guess I imagine real closeness is what happens when you meet someone who can … fill in the missing pieces and make you feel whole and satiated. They make you a solid thing, rather than a fading ghost of a person. They make you feel at peace as opposed to always feeling like you’re searching for something to fill the void.”
    He nodded. It was suddenly silent. The candle on the table flickered as a breeze blew through the patio, and he just watched her. Her focus became distant, and as she stared at the table between them, she seemed lost in her own thoughts. Her lips were a tight line and her brow wrinkled. Was it worry?
    “Well, that was just fucking beautiful. Couple of poets right here,” Ian commented sarcastically as he sat up to the table. “How about I get another bottle of wine, so the two of you can get even more buzzed? I would love to see you both in drunk tears by the end of the night.”
    “Oh, shut up,” she muttered. “It’s called cerebral adult conversation. You’re just too immature to keep up.” Gray looked at Ian and winked, and he reached over, covering her hand with his and squeezing.
    Ian stood then. “I wasn’t kidding about more wine. And I think I’ll grab a deck of cards. You two stay put.”
    As Ian walked back into the house, Jas chuckled quietly as she watched him curiously.
    “Tell me about your grandmother. You said you lived with her. Is she still in San Diego?”
    He watched her calm and intrigued eyes for a moment, relieved this topic was easier than the last. “Yeah. She does. We’re very close. I talk to her every week.” He was quiet for a moment, but Gray didn’t interrupt. She waited to see if he was going to say something more. “She’s… Well, she’s spry as hell for eighty-nine actually. More attitude in that woman than most anyone I’ve ever met.”
    Gray smiled at him. “I’m glad you have her.”
    He watched her for a moment, and she held her focus on him