The Promise of Rainbows Read Online Free PDF Page A

pause. “I’ll bet you’re good at cooking. In fact, I’ll bet you’re pretty much good at everything you do.”
    A while back, Jake had told J.P. he thought she was charming. Apparently she’d been upgraded to proficient.
    “My mama is a good cook, and we needed to help growing up.”
    “I expect so,” he said quietly. “I met your mama at one of your brother’s parties, but I’d like to get to know her better. She sounds like an incredible woman.”
    “You should come to her church,” she said brightly. “And hear her preach. She’s in her element there.”
    From the way he closed down and physically backed away from her, she knew she’d made a terrible mistake.
    “I don’t go to church any more,” Jake said, looking down at his boots. “Not that I don’t believe or respect other’s beliefs.”
    “Of course,” she said immediately. This topic was a powder keg. “Why don’t you get our tea? I’m going to wander around, if that’s okay, and let some ideas form.”
    His chest rose as if expelling a tortuous breath. “Take as much time as you’d like. I want you to have a feel for the house. I’ll be in the kitchen.”
    She made herself smile. “Good. I’ll find you.”
    When he left, she stared at the plain, bare walls. And wondered over the pain in her heart how such a loving and gentle man had been reduced to living in an empty house and closing himself off from church.

Chapter 3
     
     
    Jake wet a paper towel with cold water and dabbed the back of his neck. He hadn’t expected Susannah’s invitation to church—although he should have. She was rightly proud of her mama’s preaching. And inviting people to services was the Southern way. Heck, J.P. had already issued that same invitation.
    But it had filled him with shame to tell Susannah church wasn’t for him anymore. What must she think of him now? She would want to be with a man who would go to services with her every Sunday and raise their kids in some kind of faith. Even her continued attraction to him couldn’t compensate for that.
    How was he supposed to tell her he’d lost all his faith when God hadn’t answered his prayer to save Booker? That he didn’t understand God or the way things worked anymore? He’d prayed in the beginning, sure, but prayers had done nothing to save Booker and a few of his other friends. Wasn’t his friend, Monty, walking around with a prosthetic leg after stepping on a landmine? There had been a few near misses for him as well, and he had a scar on his shoulder to prove it.
    The more senseless carnage he’d witnessed, the harder it had become to pray. What kind of God would allow such atrocities to happen? Growing up in a country that had a constant supply of food and water and a system of government that dealt mostly—albeit imperfectly—with things like violence and disorder hadn’t prepared him for the chaos of war. Unspeakable things happened in battle.
    Since there weren’t any ready answers to his questions, he’d decided to do the respectful thing and stop pretending to believe in a God that allowed these things to happen. He honored other people’s beliefs—was even heartened by their prayers for him and their own stories of how prayer had changed their lives—but it wasn’t his story.
    Jake felt like he’d been abandoned by God, and maybe it was true. Forgiveness was all well and good, but wasn’t there a line whereby a person simply couldn’t come back? Maybe he wasn’t redeemable after everything he’d done, and that’s why God hadn’t saved Booker when he’d cried out. God sure acted like He didn’t love Jake anymore, if you asked him.
    “Are you okay?” she asked, making him jump.
    The damp paper towel fell from his hand and plopped on the floor. He snapped down to retrieve it. “It’s a little warm in here, don’t you think?” he asked, hoping to cover up his moment of weakness.
    She rubbed her arms. “Actually, it feels a little cool to me. Maybe I’ll