The Other Side of the Dale Read Online Free PDF Page A

blithely, quite oblivious to the sharpness in my reply, ‘is what are you going to do about it?’
    ‘I’m afraid I can’t do anything about it,’ I replied.
    ‘As I said, I want to –
What?
’ The torrent momentarily faltered. ‘Why can’t you do anything about it?’
    ‘Because you are through to the wrong department,’ I answered when, thankfully, I could finally get a word in.
    ‘Well, why didn’t you tell me? Letting me ramble on.’
    ‘I have been attempting to,’ I replied, trying to remain calm.
    ‘Don’t take that tone with me, young man. I’m only trying to get what’s right for my Kimberley.’
    ‘I am sure that you are but I can’t help you because I do not deal with free school meals. You need another department.’
    ‘Well, who am I through to then?’
    ‘The Inspectors’ Division.’
    ‘I don’t want the police! Why did they put me through to the police? I asked for the education! I mean, I’m not made of money, feeding this telephone like an ’ungry piggy bank. I wanted the education –’
    ‘This is the education,’ I attempted another explanation, ‘but – ’
    ‘Well, why did you tell me it was the police?’
    ‘I didn’t say it was the police!’
    ‘Yes, you did.’
    ‘Now, look, madam, this is getting us nowhere.’
    ‘That’s the first sensible thing I’ve heard you say, young man!’
    ‘If you would just listen to me for a moment – ’
    ‘You said I was through to the inspectors.’
    ‘It’s the inspectorate, the
education
inspectorate.’ This was getting out of hand.
    ‘And you don’t deal with free school meals?’
    ‘No, I don’t deal with free school meals,’ I sighed. ‘I deal with school inspections!’
    ‘Well, who does then?’
    ‘What?’
    ‘Deal with free school meals?’
    ‘I don’t know. I’m new.’
    ‘Oh, isn’t that just typical.’ The verbal badminton ceasedfor a moment and the caller’s voice took on a slow and sarcastic tone. ‘Typical that is! Nobody ever knows. Everybody’s new. Just passed on from pillow to post while my Kimberley has to do without her free school meals.’
    ‘If you would like to leave your name and number –’
    ‘I’m in a telephone box!’
    ‘Well if you could just hold the line for one moment – ’
    ‘There’s a queue.’
    ‘… I will find out who may be able to help you.’
    ‘Huh! Hang about in a drafty telephone booth that smells like a public lavatory while you traipse off to find someone who will probably be about as much help as you. And you’re about as useful as a chocolate teapot! My brains aren’t made of porridge, you know!’
    ‘Well, if you leave your name and address, I promise that I will –’ The telephone went dead. ‘Oh dear,’ I sighed, ‘I hope this is not a flavour of things to come.’
    ‘Mr Phinn?’ I turned to find a young woman with bubbly blonde hair, long metal earrings and a bright open smile, framed in the doorway. ‘Is it Mr Phinn?’
    ‘That’s right,’ I replied.
    ‘I’m Julie,’ she said. ‘The inspectors’ clerk. I’ve been looking all over the office for you. I thought you might have come and gone. I was late because the traffic in Fettlesham was dreadful this morning. Being market day, the roads are a nightmare. You must have come up the back stairs.’
    I rose and shook a long, red-nailed hand. ‘I’m very pleased to meet you, Julie,’ I said. ‘I’m sorry, I assumed the entrance was around the side.’
    ‘That’s all right. It’s a bit of a maze in this building. Anyway, the important thing is that you have found us.’ She looked down at her hand and sighed dramatically.‘Gone and snagged a nail. Here, let me move all my things out of the way.’ She collected the shopping basket, handbag, scarf and keys and dumped them on a chair, continuing her chatter as she did so. ‘I’ve been working in this office this week. It’s got more space than my room down the corridor. Well, I say “room”, but it’s got about as