The Old Neighborhood Read Online Free PDF Page A

:
Why
don’t I ski? Bobby?
(Pause)
Oh shit.
(Sighs)
I just, you know, the thing of it, the thing of it is, I just wanted some skis. Would it have killed them to’ve given me a pair of skis? Was that so ludicrous? A monster like myself? Was that so … 
(Pause)
    BOB :
(Softly)
 … yes …
    JOLLY : Christmas Day.
(Pause)
Christmas Day.
    BOB : I know.
    JOLLY : She …
    BOB : Wait, wait, I remember.
    JOLLY : You …?
    BOB : I remember …
    JOLLY : You remember what?
    BOB : Christmas Day. A plaid … a … a plaid something.
    JOLLY : A …
    BOB : … that they gave me.
    JOLLY : … yes?
    BOB : A plaid …
    JOLLY : A reversible raincoat.
    BOB : That’s right.
    JOLLY : A reversible raincoat.
    BOB : … what did I do?
    JOLLY : Monday morning. Took it back to Fields.
    BOB : I took it back to Fields.
    JOLLY : And traded it in.
    BOB : That’s right.
    JOLLY : For what?
    BOB : I …? What? No, I’ve forgotten. Oh, my God. Jol. For what, then, a year …?
    JOLLY : … easily … easily …
    BOB : For
a year
. “Where is that raincoat, Bubby …?”
    JOLLY : “…  we gave you for Christmas. That you liked so much?”
    BOB : “I left it at the …” Ah. Ah. Wait. Wait. Jol. Wait, wait, wait. I went back to Fields.
    JOLLY : Um hmm.
    BOB : TO SEE COULD I BUY BACK THAT COAT.
    JOLLY : That’s right.
    BOB : … could I buy back the raincoat.
    JOLLY : That’s right, Buuby.
    BOB : Could I buy back the Fucking Raincoat to stop the questions as to where was the raincoat. That I was so grateful for.
    JOLLY : … that’s right.
    BOB : That stupid raincoat. And that woman at Fields. Sent to fucking
Germany
to see, could they replace that raincoat.
    JOLLY : That’s right, Bobby.
    BOB : And calling her back. And calling her back Thursday, and oh, what a pathetic fucking thing.
(Pause)
My plaid. My Plaid Reversible Raincoat.
(Pause)
    JOLLY : And, you know, I’m thinking, all of this, “If you don’t
like
it, you can take it back …” If they had
loved
us. Mightn’t they have
known
what we might want? I know what
my
kids want.
(Pause)
I know what
my
kids want. It’s not that difficult. It’s Just Not. I’m sorry. Carl says … Carl, say what you will. I’m sorry, every weekend, Every weekend. You know what we
did
last weekend? They had friends sleep over. We made
popcorn
. We made
fudge
. Next morning we made
pancakes
. You know, you know, I turned into a fine cook.
    BOB : I know you did.
    JOLLY : No, I mean, you ain’t seen
nothing
here …
    BOB : It was fantastic …
    JOLLY : I mean a
fine
cook.
    BOB : Jol, I had the dinner …
    JOLLY : That was nothing.
    BOB : No. It was fantastic.
    JOLLY : No, I mean, Carl, you know, I wanted to do it, for him …
    BOB : … uh huh …
    JOLLY : Because before
Carl you
know …
    BOB : Uh huh …
    JOLLY : Before
Carl
 … I …
    BOB : I remember, Quiche Soup …
    JOLLY : … I couldn’t Drop an Egg.
    BOB : Uh huh …
    JOLLY : Why
should
I …? Hummm?
She
never taught me … She never taught me a
thing
 … I’m in here, the girls.
Every night
 … Every Night I’m in here …
    BOB : I saw them.
    JOLLY : And they’re learning to cook.
    BOB : I know.
    JOLLY : You see, Bob? Do you see? This is a
family. (Pause) And some day
, Bob. I’m going to be dead. Some day,
they
are going, they are going to be in a kitchen. And they’re going to say. To their girls … “
My
mom …”
(Pause)
Because this is a Family. You see? “My mom used to do it this way.”
(Pause)
“This is what my mom taught me.”
(Pause)
And every weekend. We had a four-hour session of, we played
Monopoly
. We, God forgive us, we went
bowling
, we …
    BOB : … the kids seem so …
    JOLLY : … we rented a
film
we thought they and their friends would enjoy. And Carl, God bless that man, do you hear?
    BOB : Yes.
    JOLLY : God
bless
him. And they’d say: “Jol:
Jolly
. We, waaal, he just …” And “We don’t feel …”
    BOB : Uh huh …
    JOLLY : “Your