The Lovers Read Online Free PDF Page A

water. I have an odd sensation of being grounded to the earth, suddenly. And my attraction to Audrey is part of it, although the knowledge that we share this bit of our histories is part of it, too.
    â€œI do understand,” I tell her. “My parents haven’t been aware of my existence since…maybe ever. Or maybe only vaguely, as though I’m at the edge of their consciousness. It’s better not to be there, not to have to feel that. Easier.”
    â€œYes, exactly. I don’t want that in my face every day. I don’t want to have to feel that exclusion. I can get that shit anywhere in this world.”
    â€œBut you…you never do, I’m sure. Not from anyone else.”
    â€œWhy would you say that?”
    She looks truly puzzled.
    â€œBecause,” I start, having had too much to drink to censor myself, “you are the most amazing person, Audrey. Fascinating. And I don’t mean that in any sort of patronizing way. Not like some zoo animal to stare at and study. But you make me want to…be with you. And I think everyone must feel that way.”
    She smiles brilliantly, leans over and kisses my cheek. Her lips leave a hot, damp imprint on my skin. I want to lift my hand, press my fingers there, but I don’t do it. Instead, I cross my legs, trying to ease the sudden ache there.
    I really shouldn’t have drunk so much wine.
    â€œSweet Bettina,” she says, pulling her hand back to swig from the bottle once more. The wine is nearly gone. “But it’snot true, you know. The world at large rejects me. Always has.”
    There is pain behind this simple statement. I want to make her feel better. But I don’t know how.
    Yes, you do…
    God, what am I thinking? She is not flirting with me!
    Is she?
    â€œWe should get back,” she says. “I want to get up early tomorrow and hit the beach before I write.”
    â€œOh, okay. Sure.”
    She stands, and, taking my hand, helps pull me to my feet. I’m a little dizzy with the wine. And she pulls me in, her arms going around me. The wine bottle is still in her hand and it presses, hard and cool, against my back. And against the front of my body, her breasts are warm. My nipples harden instantly, my sex going damp. She hugs me tightly, briefly, then lets me go.
    â€œCome on. Time for bed.”
    Yes, please…
    I follow her silently over the dunes, my legs working against the sand, my muscles fatigued. We reach flatter ground, the sand turning to gravel, and then we’re at the door to my cabin.
    â€œâ€™Night, Bettina. See you in the morning.”
    She waves and is gone, disappearing down the dark path to the main house.
    I stand there, stupefied. I realize I’m barefoot, the gravel biting into the soles of my feet. My sandals are on the beach somewhere. I should go get them, but I don’t.
    What had I expected? Wanted? I don’t even know.
    Shaking my head, I step onto the small porch, open the blue door. Inside, I turn on a bedside lamp, then go into thebathroom to wash my face. But the splash of cold water doesn’t help. My body is on fire.
    I know what will help.
    I strip my clothes off as I walk from bath to bed, pull open the nightstand drawer and grab my flesh-colored vibrator. In moments I am on the bed, naked, my legs spread wide, as the cool night air plays over my skin, seducing me, taunting me. My nipples are two hard points, red and swollen.
    I turn the phallus on and lower it between my thighs. I often tease myself, let the buzzing instrument play around my pussy lips, lovely, light touches. But I am already so turned on I hurt. I go right for my clit, turning the vibrator up high and pressing down hard.
    God, it feels good, that humming going through my system, a sharp, stinging current. Desire builds, my entire sex engorged, painful. I need to come so badly.
    I press harder, moving it slowly from side to side, rubbing my hard little clitoris with the