The Lost Blogs Read Online Free PDF Page B

Splinter)
    Evil Wooden Ship of Death
    Really Bad Evil Wooden Ship of Death (emphasize the “Really Bad” part)
    So Bad You Can’t Even Imagine, Evil Wooden Ship of Death
    With limited food and water (as we are working with rations) I find that my mind is not as sharp as usual, but I do believe
     that one of the “Wooden Ship of Death” titles would far surpass the silly
Niña
naming scheme, as we are not little girls but grown men.
    I will continue to put more thought into this matter and will follow up once again tomorrow with my twenty-second blog entry
     from my cabin here on the ship.
    By the way, we are on course.

From: http://www.herman_melville.com/~blog/
    Subject: …
    Call me crazy… but having visited the washroom twice earlier, my ears had heard what only now my eyes could confirm. Flipping
     and flopping around in the sparkling white bowl was a huge black object that most definitely did not belong. Alas, it was
     encroaching on my simple existence and would have to be dispatched before any more harm could be done.
    The invention, of course, of the flushable chamber pot has been around for decades but just recently found its way into the
     homes of those in the New York City area. Outhouses still reign supreme if not simply being the result of a lack of financial
     possibility, since the purchasing and installing of such an item can cost more than one expects.
    My fears, of course, were apparent; there being a certain goal in mind when I found myself behind closed doors and ready to
     unleash what “once was” into the twisting pipes below my house. Yet, knowing that somewhere in the water lurked a foreign
     creature with the ability to snap at me while I sat, caused my thoughts to turn toward eradication before evacuation. There
     being nothing worse than being blind while exposed, the solution was evident.
    Still in its infancy, the sewer systems set up for the country and outerlying areas of New York City are far from perfection.
     With limited areas set aside for the disposal of such household remnants, and a limited amount of service personnel available
     to assist in such matters, it often surprises one just how little there is to be done when the mechanics behind the new technology
     do not function correctly or altogether back up.
    Of course, before sitting down to do my prearranged business, I had to do away with the foreign creature that had obviously
     sethis sights on disrupting my peace. I stood above the wavering pool of water, peering into the depths for a quick glance at
     that which was pursuing me. In fact, I was pursuing the creature, being the heathen that I was, in an attempt to put an end
     to the terror it had caused as of late. The rubber plunger, attached to the side of the mechanism, would cause the undoing
     of the mysterious black insect.
    As quickly as I could, I lifted up the instrument while purposefully jabbing the side of the ceramic structure with force
     … causing the monstrous creature to emerge once again from the depths of the darkened hole at the base of the bowl. I jammed
     the object, gripped tightly in my hand again and again. I stabbed; for hate’s sake. Spit my last breath at the blackened creature.
     Eyes matched for a moment, as our souls connected in this battle of wills.
    In the process, liquid splashed and spilled forth upon the tile floor, causing gravity to take hold and flip me on my back,
     my leg bending beneath me. The room went dark, much like the mask of the evil creature, and I awoke hours later with my leg
     lifted high above the bed.
    As I will be here for some time, leg tied and courage battered—I suspect I will continue to elaborate on my quest to do away
     with that which caused me this pain.
    Revenge will be mine. That much I will see to.
    In the meantime, if you’re interested you can purchase my latest books here and here .

From: http://www.thomaspaine.com/
    Subject: Self-Publishing!
    With the current state of the Revolutionary War,