The LONELY WALK-A Zombie Notebook Read Online Free PDF Page A

care if you're alive or dead, they shoot to kill, and then they dismantle you as if you were a Tinker toy.
    I've made up my mind. I'm going to let them.
    Shoot me. Why not?
    I don't commit suicide because that's for the living. I commit deathicide . I'll simply walk out into the open and let them explode, with impunity, this long dead body.
    There aren't any zombies like me. But I am becoming one of them. I either die to this world or I turn on men and I eat. I'm the only one who ever knew what this is like and I'm coming to pieces before my own eyes.
    I have no ears. My hair fell out. My eyes are going. I can hardly see to write this. My dwindling muscles have contracted and my bones been broken a thousand times over. I stumble when I try to walk. It's only my brain that knows anything and what it knows it's tired of knowing. There's no pleasure, no curiosity, no hope, no reason to keep going.
    The best I can do is go into that forever darkness where I won't worry about being alone again. I'm placing this notebook in an envelope and I'll hold it to my chest as the gangs shoot my head into tiny bits with their telescopic rifles.
    What becomes of my testament is not of my concern after tonight. I could have sent it to the president in Washington, D.C.--if he's even still there. He's a good man trying to keep a nation together, though I could tell him it's no use. He would never reveal it to people, he couldn't, I understand that, and it doesn't matter that much to me anymore. I thought I could find a way to go on, find a reason why this happened to me. I thought my survival might help in stopping the plague, or that at the very least I could provide an enlightenment about life after death, but I don't think so now. It appears it was futile to ever begin this long trek across miles and oceans.
    I don't mean to sound like suffering Jesus or the tortured Job. I thought I could still find a shred of happiness or some meaning, even a tiny pleasure left to me, but I should have known better. I can do one thing. I can tell you to stand and fight. The armies will fall eventually. You'll be on your own. Order will give way even more and there will be nothing but chaos, enemies, and insanity. If you don't fight to the end, are you worthy to be called human? Look in the mirror. Could you call yourself human?
    There has never been a plague like this one and there never will be one again because this is the last. You know they don't understand how the virus mutates and defies all efforts to contain it. As soon as something is tried, the virus changes, finds a way to survive, grows ever stronger and impenetrable. The promised vaccine might work and it might not. None of the "cures" worked, did they? Those early promises of a cure were ridiculous and we know it now. As expensive as they were to make and no matter how much pollyanna-hopeful-bullshit scientific hype you heard about them, they did not work, did they?
    You should be ready if the vaccine doesn't work either.
    The world we have known might really return to the pristine beginning of time when it was nothing more than a revolving ball of watery silence spinning in space.
    If you fight and if you survive it unscathed then there might be a slim possibility there really is a God. I hope there is. I pray there is. For all our sakes.
    Unfortunately, my earnest opinion--and please feel free to disregard it because I don't want to leave you without all hope, that was never my intention--but it just seems to me, in this hour before my real true death, that Nietzsche was probably right.
    The son of a bitch.

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    If you enjoyed this story, please leave a review. Read on for the first chapters of BANISHED from Billie Sue Mosiman's latest novel.

    BANISHED

    By

    Billie Sue Mosiman

    Copyright 2011 by Billie Sue Mosiman, All rights reserved.
    Cover art by Neil Jackson, Copyright 2011

    "The Magician rearranges the Universe to make himself the center, the Mystic rearranges himself to find the