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She barely knew Stryker Reed. What if she said yes to marriage and it was a horrible mistake? But then what if she said no and she regretted it for the rest of her life? Did she want to marry Stryker because of excellent sex or did she really love him and want to marry him regardless? Bloody hell I don't bloody know. Mardi pulled out of Stryker's arms and headed to the kitchen in search of coffee. She could not think clearly when he held her and she needed a clear head now. She had gone from gob-smacked confusion to lust and now panic with the word marriage and forever flashing like a neon signs in her mind. Marriage was a huge commitment. It was not like she wanted to have sex with anyone else, it was just the whole 'til death do we part thing that she was starting to 34
    The Goddess Within
    by Amarinda Jones
    get her knickers in a twist over. Mardi blew out a frustrated sigh and switched on the coffee maker.
    She jumped as she felt Stryker slide in behind her.
    "Morning." He kissed her neck and looked at her with concern as she pulled away from him. "Are you okay?"
    "I'm just tried. I didn't get much sleep last night." She had actually had the best sleep of her life until she woke up in a panic.
    "You were snoring your head off in my arms."
    "I do not snore and that's a very ungallant thing to say." Did she snore? How embarrassing.
    "What's up?" Stryker tried to pull her back into his arms.
    "Nothing, I just need some space and you're crowding me."
    Stryker looked at her puzzled.
    "You wanted me to crowd you and—let's not forget—fill you, last night."
    "That's so tacky to mention that now." Even though it was true Mardi did not need to be reminded how much she physically wanted this man. She had to work out if she loved him for him, or just for sex.
    "You are just spoiling for a fight aren't you?" Stryker guessed correctly. "You're looking for a reason not to marry me."
    "I am not," scoffed Mardi knowing she did not sound like she meant it.
    "Oh yeah you are."
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    The Goddess Within
    by Amarinda Jones
    "I just need some space. You've rushed me into this." This had been the wildest and admittedly best two weeks or her life, but could she build a future on that?
    "You know, you really didn't have to go along with me if you didn't want to." Stryker crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her knowingly.
    "You are very pushy."
    "I see. I made you lick and suck me all over. I made you beg me to take you."
    "This is a really inappropriate conversation for breakfast."
    "You're a chicken." Stryker shook his head. He was one hundred percent correct.
    "Whatever—I think you should go." Because I have no idea what I am going to do or say next.
    "So you're going into a mood now?"
    "If I was dumb enough to marry you, you would see once a month what a real mood was."
    "At least it would be genuine and not an escape route."
    "You know the way out."
    "And you know where to find me if you want me Mardi." 36
    The Goddess Within
    by Amarinda Jones

Chapter Five
    Mardi stared at the computer screen. The data normally meant nothing to her as it was just a bunch of figures she keyed in every day and it meant even less today and she did not care if the work got done at all. She had the walkie-talkie tuned to miscellaneous chatter but other than a bunch of truckers swearing and a cafeteria lady flirting with some man on route to deliver paper cups to her, nothing could not take her mind off Stryker and what she should do. Yesterday she had fooled herself into believing she did not need Stryker and that she was okay just the way she was. Celibacy and solitude meant independence and self justification. She had got on fine without him before. Mardi did not need love to find meaning in her life. She was a whole person without a man.
    "What a load of crap," Mardi muttered to herself. The bottom line was she needed Stryker Reed in her life. She loved him. Mardi just had to gird her loins and go get her man. "Okay time to stop being a big dummy