The Girl Who Blew Up Her Brother and Other Naughty Stories for Good Boys and Girls Read Online Free PDF

means getting a hard time. There’s always someone who’s going to come along and try to take your place. As his dad had said, ‘Who needs that?’
    You’ll still see Bernie at Craven Cove, though. He’s the one in the deck chair, wearing a big smile. And an even bigger hat.

the kindy kid
from
Hell

    From the moment Mrs Waite mentioned a double excursion, our whole class was abuzz with excitement. A whole day off school to visit the State Library, and then a tour of an ice-cream factory! Eat as much as you like!
    But there was a catch.
    Isn’t there always?
    â€˜As part of your education,’ said Mrs Waite, ‘we are going to be joined by our kindergarteners, or kindy kids as we call them. And guess what? Each of you will be given one kindy kid to hold by the hand and it’s your job to look after them. We’ll be there to watch over everybody, of course, but it’s basically up to you.’
    â€˜Hold their hand?’ asked Trevor Prior. ‘They’ll have probably just had their finger up their nose!’
    â€˜Quite possibly,’ said Mrs Waite. ‘And in a way, that’s the point. Teaching you that being in charge isn’t always easy. That with freedom comes responsibility.’
    â€˜Sounds like a load of bull,’ whispered Trevor. ‘If my kindy kid tries anything, I’ll kick his butt.’
    It wasn’t long before we were standing outside the library, surrounded by the roughest-looking lot of kindy kids I’ve ever seen. Some had runny noses, others scratched their smelly little bottoms, a few even had bits of breakfast still on their faces. And you should have seen mine! He was the most evil-looking little monster you could imagine.
    He had sticky-up hair, dirty hands, a nasty-looking grin, smelly socks and a large boogie smeared right across his face. And just to say hello, by way of a joke, he kicked me right in the shin.

‘Hello,’ I said, ‘my name’s Phillip. What’s yours?’
    â€˜Oscar,’ he replied.
    â€˜Well, Oscar,’ I said, ‘kick me like that again and I’ll push you in front of a truck.’
    Oscar seemed to go all quiet after that.
    Or so I thought. It was only a short time later that I looked down to drag Oscar by the hand into the library – and realised that he’d gone! Disappeared off the face of the planet.
    How dare he! I thought. I’ll wring his little neck.
    Then I had another thought. What if he’s run onto the road? And he does get hit by a truck!
    I’d never forgive myself.
    I started to panic. Should I tell the teachers? Then I felt a sharp pain in my toe.
    It was Oscar suddenly back by my side and stamping on my foot.
    â€˜You little idiot!’ I yelled. ‘Nick off like that again and you’re history.’
    And you’ll never guess – Oscar grinned, turned, and ran off again!
    â€˜Did you see that?’ I said to Mrs Waite. ‘He didn’t even listen!’
    â€˜Do you always do what you’re told?’ asked Mrs Waite.
    â€˜Yes,’ I said quickly. Then, ‘No.’
    Off I ran, chasing the little rat, only to find that Oscar was already in the library, tearing pages out of a very old-looking book.
    â€˜No!’ I screamed, then, as I dived to catch him, he shot off again, straight under a table.
    A reading table, with lots of serious-looking men seated around it. Guess who they glared at? Not Oscar – they hadn’t even seen him.
    â€˜There’s a boy under –’ I tried to say.
    â€˜Shush!’ they hissed back.
    â€˜But –’ ‘Shush!’
    What could I do but wait? From under the table I could see Oscar grinning at me as he quietly tied the men’s shoelaces together.
    Who is this little ratbag? I thought. The kindy kid from hell?
    Of course, Oscar quickly became bored.
    No sooner had I turned to see the rest of my class walking in than I realised he’d