The General and the Horse-Lord Read Online Free PDF Page B

really think what you have is the best there is, or even in any way an acceptable life? Kim’s words felt like a dirge in his head. What John thought was he was doing the best that anyone could, given a similar set of circumstances. But was that really good enough? Was he dragging Gabriel into some sort of shadow life, not fully here or there? No, he wasn’t. Gabriel didn’t get dragged anywhere. They’d both made their choices a long time ago, and he thought Gabriel, just like himself, was happy for the grace notes in his life, the few hours they could be themselves, with all their public masks removed, a few gentle and intimate hours between friends. Wasn’t that the best one could ask for? A life of service to others, with the occasional grace note? So why did he still feel so lonely? Why had so much of this last year been spent feeling an ache for something he couldn’t describe even to himself?
    Gabriel had been a Horse-Lord long before Kim started calling him by that name. He’d been a squadron leader when he was a young pilot, always had the most fearless flyers in his group. Gabriel’s squadrons were named after the famous horse warriors of the past, and he’d ridden his Apache like it was a wild pony, just barely under his control. When John flew with him the first time, his group was named for the horse warriors of the plains, the Sioux, and Gabriel’s chopper was named in honor of Crazy Horse. When they made love for the first time, Gabriel had been channeling the great Mongol warlord, Genghis Khan.

Chapter 3

     
     
    J OHN suspected he wouldn’t hear from Gabriel for a while, after Kim’s drama-queen performance at Ho Ho’s. He had his family and his new law practice, after all, and neither one left a lot of free time for dinner with old friends and their pain-in-the-ass nephews. So he was pleasantly surprised when Gabriel sent him an email, inviting him to go to the ball game on Friday night with himself and his son, Juan. John was a fan of the Albuquerque Isotopes, the local minor league team. They worked hard and had occasional victories which made everyone in town feel a little more hopeful about the state of the world.
    It had been more than six months since he had seen Juan, so he didn’t know about the shaggy hair. When he was younger, Juan had sported hair like his father’s, a trim military cut. Now he looked like one of the Beatles, about 1965, and he reached up every few seconds and pressed his bangs down over his forehead, like he was trying to get the hair to grow faster. He had braces too, something new. John wasn’t sure which of these changes to mention, given the drooping shoulders, sullen face, and general look of misery. Juan was acting like he was being dragged to the brig, not to the ball game. They found their seats, just left of home plate, and Gabriel gave Juan twenty dollars. “This is for food. Don’t make yourself sick.” He handed over two additional twenties. “This is for either a cap or a tee shirt. If you can’t wear it to school, it’s not okay with me or your mother. And I want the change and a receipt.”
    Juan pocketed the cash with a nod, then escaped to the food court. John turned to watch him climb the stairs. The food court at Isotopes Park was a madhouse of American gluttony. You could get a foot-long Coney or Chicago dog, of course, but also pizza, pork tamales, shrimp stir-fry, funnel cakes with powdered sugar on top, and vindaloo curry. The flavors of these competing cuisines mixed with the smell of spilled beer and popcorn that hung like a cloud over the park. “Is he okay up there by himself?”
    Gabriel nodded. “Apparently he’s meeting some of his crew from school, which is the only reason he agreed to come.”
    “I remember when he used to walk behind you and try to match his stride with yours. He’d have to take a couple of running steps to catch you up every few seconds. Then he’d try to match your steps again.”
    “Those days are