The Game of Denial Read Online Free PDF Page A

to rest her arms on the entrance to one of the stalls. The animal slowly munching its feed raised its head and gazed at her with curious brown eyes. The light breeze flowed along the covered walkway, ruffling Joan's short hair. She reached up unconsciously to run her fingers through it, brushing it to the side. Meadowbrook Farm was an idyllic place. The sounds and smells brought back memories of her childhood when her family had lived a simple, unhurried life.
    "Hey, Mom," Tucker's voice said. Joan turned her head and smiled at the sight walking toward her. It was something she hadn't seen since before Martine died. Tucker and his family, accompanied by Charmaine, Francesca, and Meg were casually approaching. To see them all together, the family she and Martine had created, brought tears to her eyes. She blinked them away.
    "This is a surprise," she said. "What are you all doing?"
    "Taking an after dinner stroll," Charmaine answered. "The kids were getting a little antsy. So before they killed someone with an errant horseshoe we thought maybe we could work off their extra energy." Charmaine shrugged. "I heard it works for dogs."
    Mitchell ran up to Joan and wrapped his arms around her. She gazed down and ran her fingers through his strawberry-blond hair. "Hello, sweet boy," she said softly, pressing him against her body.
    "You look sad, Gramma," the eight-year-old said.
    "Just thinking how beautiful you all are," Joan replied, bending down to kiss the top of his head.
    She greeted Morgana in the same way when the five-year-old joined her brother and threw her arms around Joan's leg. Joan picked her up and planted a loud, sloppy kiss on the girl's cheek, which was followed by a fit of giggling.
    "Thinking about Mama?" Fran asked.
    Joan looked at Morgana and smiled. "Always," she said. "Right, mon chou ?"
    "Tell us about her," Meg said.
    "You've all heard everything about her a million times before."
    "We'll never get tired of hearing your stories about Mama," Tucker said. "We don't want to forget her either."
    Joan carried Morgana to a row of hay bales leaning against the wall of the stable and sat down. Tucker pulled several bales into a semi-circle as if they were sitting around a campfire.
    "What do you want to know?" Joan asked as she smoothed her granddaughter's hair and tucked it behind her little ears.
    "Tell us how you and Mama met," Fran said. "I could listen to that story a million times. It's so romantic."
    Joan leaned back against the wooden wall. Morgana rested her head on Joan's shoulder and she was sure her granddaughter would be asleep soon. "Now you're asking me to really reach back into my memory closet." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "I was very young. Not much older than Meg is now and on my very first trip overseas for a spring fashion week. Everything I saw left me in awe and I wasn't sure I could take it all in and actually write a decent story for the magazine I worked for. I was so fresh and brash, trying to cover for the insecurity I felt inside. I wasn't sure how to approach these rock stars of the fashion world, but soon found out that would be left to the more experienced writers. My job was to give a behind-the-scenes report. Write about the little people. Little of it would ever be in print anyway, but I thought I was the reporting guru of fashion," Joan said.
    "Anyway, one of the smaller couture houses presented their spring fashion line at a cocktail party rather than on a runway. It was near the end of the week and I was ordered to attend as a representative of the magazine. Everyone else was too partied out by then."
    Charmaine said. "I can just see someone trying to give you orders now."
    "What did you wear?" Fran asked.
    "I bet it wasn't anything comfortable," Meg said.
    "No, it wasn't," Joan said. "But I was pretty close to the end of my wardrobe by then. I wore a rather shamefully short black cocktail dress that fastened around my neck and very uncomfortable high heels."
    "No