The Douchebag Bible Read Online Free PDF

you ever get tired of being the victim? How
    many failed relationships are you going to blame on a single
    violation of your personal space? I’m not making light of it. I
    know that it is damaging, a reminder of your powerlessness
    against the world—but it should be a wake up call. We are all
    powerless against the forces of fate (or chance). We’re all on
    different paths, but they all lead to the same place.

    Life leaves no survivors.

    NOTE ON THE ABOVE: I just showed this writing to a
    friend of mine, along with the question, “Is this too offensive
    to release?” I was looking for a yes. I got one. So, I’ve included
    it here. I’m here to cross lines. This is not The Amazing Atheist
    from those cute little youtube videos you love so much—this is
    the real me. And the real me doesn’t give a fuck about your
    small-minded boundaries.

    If you’ve been raped, does the above passage add insult
    to injury? Does it make it hurt worse? How could it? If rape is
    the paramount psychological trauma in life, then how could
    my words aggravate it whatsoever? Too often in this culture,
    we fear words. But even if my words are the height of
    ignorance, they should elevate you. If you find them funny,
    then you will laugh and dismiss them as a joke. If you find
    them honest, you will respect my bravery. If you find them
    infuriating, I will have given you power. If you find them sad,
    then I have enriched you.

    Words never make less of a person, unless they are
    bland. If you feel something, then I’ve done my job as a writer.

    SOMETHING HUMAN IN THE INHUMAN
    I am a 35 year old mother of 4 sometimes in online chats. I
    have a 13-year-old daughter and men tell me how they want
    to rape her and I tell them how wet it makes my plump MILF
    pussy to hear them say that. Sometimes I meet men who go
    beyond that, who say they want to chop her young tits from
    her body, strangle her with a jump rope, things of that nature.
    My favorite scenario anyone ever conceived of was removing
    the jaws of all my children (the youngest of when I claimed to
    be 8) so that they would have direct access to their throats.
    Other times I'm a strict father with two teenage
    daughters. People write to me, asking for explicit details
    regarding their spankings, offering hints as to what they want
    to here. For instance, the question, "Do you make them get
    naked for spankings?" should always be answered yes.
    Sometimes I'm a 20-year-old girl named Kara who
    wants to sell myself into slavery. Men tell me how they want
    to whip me frequently, make me keep a buttplug in 24 hours
    a day, force me to drink their piss and eat their shit, eventually
    snuffing me on camera for the whole world’s pleasure.
    How do the preceding paragraphs make you feel?
    Offended? Excited? Amused? Depressed?
    I feel all of those things at once. I am offended that no
    one online ever rebukes me my perversity, but that they
    instead actually revel in it. I'm excited by how many perverts
    like me there are in the world. I'm amused because I know that,
    like me, they're all talk and no action. I'm depressed because
    I wish I had it in me to be all action and no talk.
    Internet sex chats are where people go to lie to one
    another about what they're capable of; pageants of lustful
    deceit where sick fucks like myself go to keep our sicknesses
    from destroying us. Zoophiles, pedophiles, slaves, masters,
    cannibalism fetishists, sadists, masochists—monsters of all
    shapes, sizes and colors congregating in a judgment-free
    environment for the purpose of helping each other get off. It's

    a beautiful thing, really.
    Ted, the overweight divorced accountant from Virginia
    becomes Ted, the tall, muscular polygamist with seven curvy
    wives that he slaps around for his amusement and 12
    daughters that he molests on the side. I talk to him as Debbie,
    the luscious and naive 19-year-old that's looking to become
    wife number 8. We both know that we’re being deceived, and
    we don't