The Devil and Danielle Webster Read Online Free PDF Page B

of Ms. Webster and Mr. Morris,
payment date to be determined later.”
    I was furious.  “That’s not fair!  You’ve just
gotten an additional soul!  For nothing!”
    “What’s in it for me?” demanded Doug.  “You can’t make
me pay when I get nothing from this.”
    “You have the satisfaction of helping out your friend,” the
Devil advised him.
    “She’s no friend of mine!”
    I began to laugh. 
    “What’s so funny?” Doug said, turning on me.
    “I’m sorry!” I gasped.  “But if you knew how many times
I used to say, ‘Go to hell, Doug Morris—‘ “  I started laughing again. 
    Doug never did have a sense of humor.  But, to my
surprise, the Devil wasn’t laughing either.  “Business is business,” he
said, almost apologetically.
    “So what am I supposed to do?” Doug asked.  “Wait for
the bill to arrive?”
    “You could do that,” said the Devil.  “But don’t
forget, you’ll be able to enjoy the moment-by-moment replay of a night of
passion with Danielle.” 
    “Are we talking a whole night?” I asked skeptically. 
    “Of course,” said the Devil, looking affronted.  “I
keep to the terms of the contract.”
    “I want you to write in that it’s a WHOLE night,
then.”  I spoke in the crispest legal-secretary tone I could manage. 
    Lucifer sighed.  “I can guarantee you 12 midnight to 6
AM.” 
    “Do it,” I said instantly.  An idea was forming in my
mind. 
    Obligingly, the Devil showed me the change in the contract,
which now read, “A night of passion with Douglas Robert Morris for Danielle Joy
Webster, guaranteed 12 midnight to 6 AM.”
    “Last chance, Romeo,” the Devil told Doug.  “You’re
paying for it; don’t you want to experience it?”
    “No offense, Danielle,” Doug said, “but I think I’ll
pass.  I don’t want to have to tell Father Fritz next time I go to
confession.” 
    “You’re already going to have to tell him that you signed
your soul to the Devil,” I reminded him, and heaven help me, I said it a bit
smugly.
    “Damn.  You’re right,” Doug said.  He looked at
our salesman.  “This is all off the clock, right?”
    “But of course!” the Devil said, with a hurt expression. 
    “You can stop looking offended,” I advised him.  “We
don’t trust you.”
    “Do I have to be here?” asked Doug.  “If we’re reliving
this, can’t I just relive it from my own bed?”
    “He wants to be in Schaumburg,” I explained to the
Devil.  “He feels safer with Tina to protect him.”
    “Oh.  Ha ha ha .  You’re SO funny, Danielle.” 
    “Besides, he has to get up in two hours.”
    Doug glowered at me.
    The Devil considered.  “I don’t see why you can’t go
back home.  Schaumburg, you say?  I have seven or eight thousand
souls there.  Okay, observe it from your own bed.  It will be like a
dream, but very real.  Call it virtual reality.  Sure, I’ll send you
back.”
    “I need clarification,” I announced.  “Are Doug and I
going to show up for this and find our middle-aged selves?  ‘Cause if
that’s the case, you can count me out right now.”
    Doug would not be outdone.  “That makes two of us,” he
said emphatically.
    “It will be a replay of your past,” explained the
Devil.  “But you will be able to think about it in the present.  Your
added ability to observe in the present while engaged in the past should
enhance your enjoyment.” 
    “A play-by-play,” I said dryly. 
    “A blow-by-blow,” Doug said, brightening.  “Now that
should be fun.” 
    “No, no, and absolutely no.”  I looked at the Devil as
imperiously as I could.  “If you give me a replay of a night featuring
blow jobs, I’ll be furious.  I will NOT be a satisfied customer.  No
blow jobs.”
    “Why, what was wrong with them?” Doug wanted to know.
    “You’re clueless,” I said witheringly. 
    “You enjoyed them!  You even told me so!”
    “I was LYING.  I was that desperate to keep you. 
No