The Color of Forever Read Online Free PDF Page B

much living to do. I just hope that when I come to the end of the road, I’ll feel like I had a great life and I did all the things I wanted to do. I’d like to feel… satisfied .” She picked up her wine again.
    “That sounds very Zenlike, but you still haven’t answered my question. Do you know what your true calling is?”
    She glanced down at her hand that rested on the base of her wineglass. “Honestly? No. And maybe that’s the biggest challenge—figuring it out.” Her eyes lifted. “At least I like my job. I have no desire to change careers—only to keep climbing in the current one—but maybe that’s the problem. I’m too content. I haven’t had a glimpse of something else. I’m not really on a quest like you are, searching for something different. Yet, I don’t want to give up the idea that there might be something more out there that will make my life truly complete.”
    I leaned forward, intrigued. “Like what?”
    She shrugged a shoulder. “I don’t know. That’s the missing piece of the puzzle. Maybe it’s a husband and kids, but I’d hate to be the sort of woman who needs a man to feel complete.”
    “Trust me,” I said, gazing about the restaurant, “a man doesn’t always make you feel complete. He can suck the life right out of you if he’s the wrong sort.”
    The waitress arrived just then and led us to our table.
    “Do you think you’ll ever forgive Mark for what he did?” Bailey asked as we sat down.
    “I’m not sure,” I replied, “but at least I no longer feel like I want him back as my husband. I haven’t felt that I wanted him that way since the accident. If anything, that vision made me realize that it’s exactly like you said: He wasn’t the one for me. We weren’t meant to be together, and maybe one day I’ll look back on this and realize he did me a favor.”
    “I’m sure you will.”
    I glanced down at my menu and decided once and for all that it was time I said good-bye to the comfort zone of this familiar life and made a change—because it was entirely possible that my true destiny was waiting for me in New York.

Chapter Ten

    Something felt different the following morning when I woke up later than usual—at 10:30 a.m. Maybe it was the sparrow singing a cheerful melody outside my bedroom window, or it could have been because of the firm decision I’d made the night before—to pursue the job at CNN and move to New York City if I was offered it.
    There’s something rejuvenating about new beginnings, and when I rose from bed, feeling inspired for the first time in ages, I realized I had been coasting along on the same dreary road for too long. Suddenly, the idea of living in a new city and making new friends sent a burst of energy into my veins, so I did it. I boogied to the kitchen to make a healthy shake for breakfast and then drove down to the station to put together a submission portfolio of my best interviews and news stories.
    When I arrived, I found Gerry, one of the weekend producers, sitting at his desk eating a mess of Mr. Noodles from a Styrofoam tub. Gerry was about my age with a face as perfect as Brad Pitt’s. Even so, he was a computer geek at heart, and he dressed like a slob and lived at home in his mother’s basement.
    “Hey,” I said, dropping my oversized purse onto the floor and flopping down on the swivel chair beside him. “I don’t suppose you’d do me a favor.”
    “Sure, what do you need?” He leaned back in his chair and raised his feet onto his desk, which was littered with an empty chip bag and a half bottle of Coca-Cola.
    Wheeling my chair closer, I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees and spoke conspiratorially. “Can you keep a secret?”
    He gave me a devious look. “Always.”
    I paused and checked over my shoulder. Thankfully, because it was Saturday morning, the newsroom was quiet. “I need to create a portfolio of some of my stories and interviews, so I have to get into the archives and pull