The Color of Forever Read Online Free PDF

could commute from Brooklyn or—”
    “Become a Jersey girl,” I finished for her, more enthusiastically, as the bartender poured our wine and slid both glasses closer.
    “Not that there’s anything wrong with that.” Bailey picked up her glass and raised it for a toast. “ Cake Boss is in New Jersey. His bakery is in a town called Hackensack, which is where John Travolta grew up.”
    “Wow.” I raised my glass as well. “You are a lovely and cascading fountain of information.”
    We clinked glasses and sipped our wine, then she set hers down on the bar. For a moment, she fingered the stem of her glass, watching me intently, then she raised an eyebrow. “There’s something else on your mind. I can tell.”
    “What do you think that is?” I asked. “Because I’m not exactly sure myself.”
    “Don’t be coy,” Bailey replied. “I know for a fact that you’ve been biting your tongue these past few months, not wanting to sound like a broken record by bringing up your… What should we call it? Your biking vision . I know you too well, Katelyn. You haven’t stopped thinking about those summers in Maine with your handsome, golden-haired husband and the son you had together. None of the men you’ve gone out with have interested you in the least, though I give you props for trying. Now you have a chance to get a job on the East Coast and I suspect you want to go—just so you can search for Chris and Logan. Because a part of you still thinks they’re real.”
    I leaned back on the bar stool and crossed one leg over the other. “That’s not why I want to go there,” I told her, even though I was lying through my teeth, mostly to myself. “I’m over that and we shouldn’t even be talking about it.”
    I didn’t want to slide back into anxious like I was in the weeks following my accident when all I’d wanted to do was escape from this life and live another one.
    “Why not?” she asked, leaning forward. “You’ve just spent the past year forcing yourself to go out on dates while trying to convince yourself that it was just a dream. Maybe it was a dream, maybe it wasn’t, but either way, something is pulling you there, and because of that, you have no interest in meeting anyone else around here .”
    I stared at the ceiling for a few seconds and shook my head at myself before turning my attention back to Bailey. “If you must know, I’m starting to wonder if it wasn’t a past life that I saw that day, but a premonition of things to come. Maybe that’s where my future is—out east.”
    “Exactly,” she said. “And I think you should follow your gut.”
    I thought about that for a moment and frowned. “Do you think Chris actually exists? I don’t even know his last name. That part was never revealed to me.”
    “Maybe,” she said, sipping her wine again. “Or maybe not. Maybe they’re just images and representations of the sort of life you want to live.”
    “ Hmm .” I sat forward, considering that. “Maybe that’s what it was. I don’t know.” I threw up my hands. “All I want is to feel as if I’m fulfilling my true destiny, whatever that might be, and I certainly don’t feel that way here and now—especially after losing the anchor job to the reporter they brought in from a different station. I feel like I’m in limbo, waiting for something to happen, and I want to feel fulfilled, like I’m on the right path.”
    “I think we all feel like we’re in limbo until we find our true calling.”
    I drew in a deep breath and let it out, taking notice of the lights dimming for dinner in the restaurant and the increasing volume of the mellow jazz playing on the sound system. “Have you found your true calling, Bailey? Or do you still feel like there’s something more out there, just over the horizon?”
    She inclined her head with a smile. “I can’t imagine living life with the belief that there’s not something more over the horizon. At least not at our age. We still have so