The Chickens of Atlantis and Other Foul and Filthy Fiends Read Online Free PDF Page B

rather one in command of most singular skills. One who can travel through time.’
    * In several of my wonderfully written novels, now available for the Kindle. (R. R.)

1353 BC
    5
    felt that Cameron Bell had deceived me and my teeth fairly ached to sink into some tender part of his anatomy. And most surely they would have done so had it not been for the clamorous sounds of alarm bells ringing that now grew loud to our ears.
    ‘The game is afoot,’ said Cameron Bell, ‘and we had best be away.’
    We returned to the time-ship in silence. Which is to say that no words passed between us as we sat side by side in another hansom cab and were driven along through the rain.
    Once more aboard the Marie Lloyd , Mr Bell had the temerity to tell me that I should cheer up because a great adventure lay ahead.
    I bared my teeth to signify contradiction. ‘Not my big adventure,’ was what I had to say.
    ‘We will travel, I think, to ancient Egypt itself.’ And with no more words spoken than that, Mr Cameron Bell took himself off to his cabin to select suitable apparel from his ample wardrobe.
    I sat in the pilot's chair and I confess I sulked. It was quite clear to me now that I had been tricked from the very start.Mr Bell, whose powers of observation and deduction were at that time unequalled by those of any other man on the planet, had clearly deduced before we launched into our journey that it was probable his adversary, the Pearly Emperor, was a fellow traveller through time. And that it was also probable that he might not be able to apprehend him at the British Museum and so would have to pursue him through time. And to draw me into this unfinished business of his, he had enticed me to share an oath which, on the face of it, had looked to be advantageous to myself.
    In short, he had played a very mean trick upon me, and when he returned to the main cabin his duplicity became clearer still.
    ‘These are for you,’ said Mr Cameron Bell.
    I turned about in the pilot's chair to peruse what ‘these’ these might be.
    ‘A white linen three-piece suit with fitted tail-snood and matching pith helmet,’ said Mr Bell. ‘I ordered it from your personal tailor. It has your own personally chosen lining, too.’ Mr Bell flashed this lining at me. It was the one I had designed myself, blue silk with banana motifs.
    It was a very beautiful suit, but I viewed it with a very jaundiced eye. ‘You knew !’ I said to Mr Bell. ‘You knew that he was a traveller of time.’
    ‘ Suspected ,’ said the smiling Cameron Bell. ‘It appeared to be the only logical conclusion, but in eighteen ninety no other time machine was available in which I could pursue him. I had to bide my time , so to speak.’
    ‘You are a very deceitful man,’ I said most bitterly. ‘You should have been honest with me from the start.’
    ‘And then you would have readily agreed to pursue this criminal rather than simply swan about through historyattending concerts or wandering the galleries of the Great Exhibition?’
    ‘Ah,’ I mused, ‘the Great Exhibition of eighteen fifty-one. I remember reading that they displayed a prodigious selection of cultivated bananas there.’
    ‘Precisely,’ said Mr Bell. ‘And I do wish to enjoy these pleasures with you. But you must understand, I am driven by my vocation. I am a detective. This is what defines me as a human being. I must bring Mr Arthur Knapton, the Pearly Emperor, to justice before I can consider doing anything else. I am sorry that I was not altogether honest with you. Would you care to try on the suit? White linen favours your complexion and it does have your personal lining.’
    ‘Well . . .’ I said, with some hesitancy.
    ‘And for desert travel one would also need one of these .’ And Mr Bell produced from the inner pocket of the suit he intended for me a bright and shiny object.
    He placed it in my hands and I gave it my attention.
    ‘It is a little hip flask,’ I said.
    ‘Turn it over,’