The Book of Murdock Read Online Free PDF Page A

my sins. I wasn’t born yet.”

    â€œBy which I take you to mean you’ve invented some of your own.”
    â€œI’d be guilty of vanity if I said I had. I confess I’ve broken a Commandment or two in order to keep others.”
    â€œDo not use the word confess in my presence. The common belief is priests are unworldly and therefore unschooled in the wickedness of man. Those who subscribe to the theory have never sat in the darkness listening to a parishioner gloat over the details of unspeakable evil under the pretense of absolution. Nearing the end I became convinced that no number of Hail Marys would spare them the pit. Meanwhile I retired to the rectory each evening bearing their burden as well as my own.”
    â€œIs that why you left the priesthood?”
    He sipped tea, drawing it in with a sucking noise like a horse drinking water, and set his cup in its saucer with a click. It seemed to place a full stop to the conversation. “No doubt you think that having chosen evangelism you’ve avoided the intolerable yoke of dogmatic principle. What the informed laity lacks in formal training it more than makes up for in passion. Have you ever attended a tent meeting?”
    â€œNo.”
    â€œThere is always one about, every Sunday in mild weather. You and I will attend the next. What do you intend to wear on this southwestern sojourn?”
    I ran a thumb under the left lapel of my coat. He shook his head slowly. I said, “Not black enough?”
    â€œNot humble enough. A made-to-order suit on a minister’s back means a hand in the collection plate.”
    â€œI can’t find a fit in a ready-made that has room for this.”
I spread the coat to show him the Deane Adams in its suspender scabbard.
    The skin of his face drew taut. “A righteous man arms himself with righteousness only.”
    â€œI consulted Samson and David on the matter. They came to a different conclusion.”
    â€œDo not seek to banter with me in Holy Writ. I will bury you, and we haven’t time for it. You must not carry a pistol into a house of God.”
    â€œThe last time I was in one I didn’t see a gun check at the door. I’m going to Texas to break up a gang. If I save a soul, it’s in the line of a collateral benefit. I’ve heard stories of pocket Bibles stopping bullets, but I don’t credit them. Bandits carry heavy calibers as a rule.”
    He started to drink again, but his hand shook. He set cup and saucer on the writing table. “At least promise me you won’t brandish it in church.”
    â€œI could, but it’d be a lie. They build churches and saloons from the same green wood and there are men who’d as soon bust a cap in a convent as in a brothel. I won’t make a point of the business without good cause, I can swear to that much. That’s why I need a coat that won’t show a bulge.”
    â€œPick one off the shelf a size too large. No, two sizes; the more shapeless the better. Bundle it in your bedroll, and when you reach your destination don’t be too conscientious about brushing and pressing. You can’t preach convincingly about a camel passing through the eye of a needle if you look as if you’d get stuck yourself.”
    â€œShould I let out my whiskers and chew a plug?”
    â€œAssuredly not. You must be clean in your habits and appearance.
Does it not sting your professional pride when you encounter a slovenly peace officer?”
    â€œI’ve trusted my life to a few. But I understand. A bad lawman paints us all. I’ll pack a razor and look to my nails.”
    â€œClean them, don’t pare them. And under no circumstances allow a barber to shave you. Fifteen cents for a haircut is as much as most ministers can afford, and they will forego a meal to avoid becoming shaggy. Fortunately, sustenance will not be a problem. Most parishioners consider having even a mediocre minister to their