better with you lately. Come on! I can’t have a party without you there.”
It’s been nearly two years since Jared left with my Mom. There has been no letters and no phone calls. Nothing.
When Meadow turned up late that night and I had to tell her Jared took off, she broke. I had to hold her while she sobbed. She was inconsolable. It was so hard on her; she lost weight, stopped playing her guitar, stopped writing.
After the first three months, when it became apparent to both of us he wasn’t coming back, we bonded even tighter. She wouldn’t leave my side. I knew being near me made her feel closer to Jared. In a way, being close to her made me feel closer to him too.
She became more involved in school, came to my every game and practice. She stopped dying colors into her hair. Her style changed; she dressed more like the popular girls. She studied extra hard and went back to not dating. Not that guys didn’t ask her out, they did. She had blossomed even more in the last two years. Now she wears more fitted clothes showing off her figure; full bust, trim waist, shapely hips and toned long legs. She’s perfect and I’m still completely in love with her. I’ve been in love with her since the day I looked into her unique eyes when she was thirteen years old. But she was off limits then. She didn’t date, and when she decided to date, my brother snapped her up. He never knew how much I loved her but I could feel his love radiating from him since the day we met her, so I always knew I wouldn’t pursue her and she would be with him. I smiled and supported them when they became an item. But he’s gone and the need for her has gotten stronger than ever.
“Okay, fine. I’ll come but you have to promise to not disappear with Melissa.”
I look over at her, surprised. Melissa is my hook-up buddy. She has been since forever. She’s easy and she worships me. Sometimes I need to feel needed in that way.
“Are you jealous, Meadow?” I grin at her arched brow before she retorts.
“No, it’s just annoying being forced to parties then being left by ten o’ clock so you can go get some with the school ‘ho.”
I laugh loud at her little outburst. “That happened once, Meds, and you were fine being swamped with admirers fighting for your attention.” I arch my own brow at her.
“Hardly, anyway I’m not interested in them.”
Her voice is small. I put my hand on her knee, sneaking looks at her while trying to concentrate on the drive to her house.
“Meadow,” I breathe. She turns her head to look out the window. She sends me mixed signals all the time. Sometimes she sounds like she’s jealous, but she never takes things further. I’m terrified if I do try to take things from more than friends, she will shut me down and I’ll lose her altogether. I couldn’t cope if I lost her.
When Jared left and didn’t come back, I felt like half the guy I used to be. He’s my brother, my best friend. I still struggle with the fact he never came back. Just looking in the mirror is painful.
I pull up and she jumps out; the tension in the car is at an all-time high. She’s in and out in minutes, her overnight bag on her shoulder. Pulling open the door she throws it in the back seat. She grins. “Let’s go, birthday boy.”
And just like that the tension evaporates.
“SO, DO YOU call him Jared when you’re making out?”
I’m ready to punch this girl in the face and I’m not one for violence. He has been gone two years and stupid drunk dumbasses still bring him up like he’s still here. Nobody else saw the Jacobs twins as individuals, even after Jared upped and left. The pain still surfaces when people talk about him, even after all this time. What people don’t realize is that to me, Justin is nothing like Jared. They’re completely different. I don’t see Jared when I look at Justin, which is crazy because they share a face, but I know both of the boys better than anyone so I’ve always