made me feel sick,
"Don’t expect me to thank you", was my reply which took us both off guard.
I hadn’t realized how angry I was, still am. This wasn’t the Meg I knew, and yet this wasn’t a situation I was used to. He, however... he was simply amused and swiped off my words like dirt from his sleeve. And deep inside it made me even more furious.
“Your... sessions have been quite a success”, he simply continued as if nothing had happened, but I have this feeling that he will keep an eye on my behavior.
So meeting up with him - whomever or whatever he is - are ‘sessions’, like I’m some damn therapist. I chose to pout and keep silent, being obedient and yet rebellious. Probably I shouldn’t have, but I just couldn’t help it; it was the only way to let off a little bit of steam.
“It never retreated by itself before”, obviously he felt like there was a need for explaining to me what he meant.
However, knowing that they already had been there, with another girl, maybe, and that it seemed to not have ended well, it made me feel even sicker.
“This is why I have assigned you a new room”, he continued, like I was an idiot and he a hero. “When the doctor dismisses you, you will have a real place to settle, which you will be allowed to furnish after your own taste in time.”
So whenever I was able to accomplish whatever they wanted me to, I would be rewarded, like I was some sort of animal too. They really do expect me to go back into that cage, and they believe that if they are waving some belongings in front of my face I will willingly risk my life again? The irony is that if I don’t I probably will be dead anyway.
And still there was something else circling in my head, something that surprised me even more that my anger or my snotty remark from before.
“Have you... what have you done with him?” I asked, realizing that I had given it a gender, and this man noticed it as well.
He cocked one brow, but didn’t answer.
“Have you killed it?” I added and made him laugh sarcastically, which made my heart drop and gave me a cold chill, even more than his words that followed.
“Deary, he’s more valuable than you or me”, he emphasized the last two words and I chose to hate him.
No, I didn’t really choose it. I mean, I’m not quick in hating someone and to be honest you cannot hate someone you don’t know so: if you are reading this: I am despising you, resenting you, five minutes after meeting you. Congratulations: you have tainted me. Showing up here after three weeks and one week after your creature almost killed me to be all that cocky, this arrogant, no, this presumptuous...
However, I know now that they probably would tolerate very much to make sure that their precious beast wouldn’t be harmed. They would allow it to kill me, to rip me into shreds and just replace me. I get it. And they would also replace him, my snotty visitor.
“So what are these sessions for, if I may ask?” I tried to copy his way of speaking, and he seemed to like it.
“To socialize it and to make it... more cooperative”, I was stunned.
Not the information itself made me speechless, because I didn’t really comprehend it at that time, but also that he answered so directly. It took me a bit of time to digest, to let this sink into my brain, to realize what he really just had told me. I already had suspected that, but hearing my theory proven true literally made it real.
I felt dizzy.
“S...so I’m his reward?”
Now he was astonished, since he really had underestimated my intelligence.
Maybe it was a mistake, but my tongue had been quicker than my mind.
He didn’t respond.
“You don’t need to punish it”, I heard my own voice speak from a distance as I tried to refocus my eyes on the person who was standing at my bedside, thinking that maybe this beast was already suffering from my absence. “Does he know that I am still alive?”
For the first time since he had gotten into this