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head whirled around. “By who?”
    “Dave Herder?” she said. “He’s in my math class.”
    Chuck snorted.
    “That preppy loser? That’s what you dig?”
    She shrugged.
    “He seems really nice, is all.”
    “Yeah, you would fall for that,” Chuck replied, shaking his head. “Good. You should go with him, wherever he and the upper classers hang out. It’s a new way to the inside.”
    “Uh,” she said, carefully. “I wasn’t thinking like that. I kind of like him.”
    “Well, you can multitask, can’t you?” he asked, and she nodded, mutely. It was easier to let Chuck think she was going to do that than argue with him.
    “But Dave’s never done anything to you guys, right?”
    “No,” Chuck snorted, and reached inside his pocket for a cigarette, scooting away from her a bit. “That one, he just likes to show off. His very existence annoys me.”
    “Is there anyone you do like, Chuck?” she teased him, curling her legs up under her. He turned around and gave her a devilish grin.
    “Well, I like you just fine, kid. Except when you don’t eat dinner.”
    “Oh,” she searched for an answer in her head. “I guess I was thinking about other things. I wasn’t feeling well.”
    He reached up to knock her on the shin with his free hand.
    “This isn’t the skating life anymore. You could do well with a few more pounds on you.”
    “Yeah,” she replied, another lie tumbling from her lips. “Yea, I’ll try.”
    “Good,” he took a long drag on the cigarette and they sat in silence for awhile. “I’m glad you’re out here.”
    “Me too,” she answered, relieved to at least tell one truth in the conversation. “Me too.”
    She looked up at the stars, things that she couldn’t see in the artificially lit New York skyline. Despite it all, she really was glad she was there.

Chapter 4
    “Richard!” Chuck screamed from across the house, catching Cassie around the waist as she hyperventilated, doubling over. These attacks scared the crap out of him, and they seem to come so randomly. Sure, he had long since figured out that there were certain triggers that should be avoided. Ice skating references, guns, and blackouts, although the second two made little sense to them. And he knew, that Cassie wasn’t going to die, that it was all in her head. Panic attacks often felt and looked like incoming death, when they weren’t really dangerous. But they still frightened him everytime they happened.
    Richard came tearing up the stairs, a spatula still in his hand.  Over the past few months, he was the one who dealt with Cassie the best. His calm attitude was never shattered, and his kind demeanor never changed. The overarching patriarch figure in the house, he approached the situation as if it wasn’t a big deal, and walked away only when it was done. Chuck trusted him immensely, unable to keep his own calm and always damn near having a panic attack himself.
    “Cassie,” Richard said, as if he were speaking to her conversationally. “Darling. It’s alright, you’re safe, here and now. It’s alright.”
    It was quite time consuming, one of these attacks. They often spent the better part of an hour with her, speaking softly, such a step away from the tough gangster exterior. She never responded until it was over, until she could breathe again, and the tears were dry. Sometimes, it took over an hour, the day slipping by. And yet, when Chuck tried to speak to her parents about it, they shrugged it off, as if it were nothing. It made him angry, beyond belief. It also upset their group dynamics. The boys, although they liked Cassie well enough, felt like they couldn’t speak freely or roughhouse as they normally did, for fear of upsetting her. They never said anything negative, but under the surface, they missed the old days.
    “Everything’s alright,” Richard said, absently, as Cassie’s breathing began to return to normal. “Everything’s fine. Captain Spatula is here.”
    She giggled at that,