Stork Naked Read Online Free PDF Page A

said.
    “You're almost as grumpy as Humfrey,” the Gorgon said, amused. “Maybe that's why I like you, Sickly Green.” To Surprise she added: “The peeve does have a redeeming quality, though it would rather be roasted on a spit than admit it.”
    Wira reappeared. “The Good Magician will see you now.”
    Surprise followed Wira up the curving narrow stone stairway to the dark crowded chamber that was Humfrey's office. The gnomelike man was sitting at his desk, poring over a huge tome. That would be his fabled Book of Answers.
    “Surprise Golem is here, Magician,” Wira murmured, and faded back.
    Humfrey looked up. “Give over, girl. This is not for you.”
    “You haven't even heard my Question!”
    “I am not answering your Question. I am giving you apt advice. You have no idea how ugly the situation is. Go now, without pursuing this matter further.”
    She glared at him, her astonishment shifting toward outrage. “The bleep I will! I want my baby. How do I recover it? That's my Question. I'll perform your year's Service. Give me your Answer.”
    The Magician shook his head. “You will not be sensibly dissuaded?”
    “I will not be,” she agreed grimly.
    “There will be no Service as such. The mission is more than sufficient.”
    “I don't understand.”
    “You will, in time. You are quite certain?”
    “Yes.”
    “Then go to the Stork Works. Che Centaur will accompany you. He knows the way, and has a pass to enter.”
    “As soon as I return the children and peeve to their homes,” she agreed eagerly.
    “No. They must go with you.” Ted and Monica appeared, evidently done with the Gorgon's refreshments.
    “They can't! If there is danger—”
    “Their parents have already agreed, knowing the stakes.”
    “That's impossible! They don't even know their children are here.”
    Humfrey snapped his withered fingers. “Parents, show yourselves.”
    The demons Vore and Metria appeared. “We learned while you were tackling the Challenges,” Vore said. “My wife Nada knows and reluctantly approves.”
    “My husband Veleno says it's up to me,” Metria said. “My referee.”
    “Your what?” Surprise asked.
    “Reference, judge, arbiter, umpire, determination—”
    “Decision?” Surprise asked.
    “Whatever,” the demoness agreed crossly. “It has to be done. But I insist on coming along.”
    “No,” Humfrey said.
    “Listen, gnome-butt, that's my son going into dreadful danger. You can't deny me my protective bent.”
    “Your what?” Humfrey asked tiredly.
    “Talent, faculty, genius, flair, gift, inclination, aptitude, knack—”
    “Instinct?”
    “Whatever, grump-face. I insist. After all, it's my turn; I never got to see the unclear missives of the Howl of Oinks.”
    “That's the nuclear missiles of Cuba, Mundania,” Humfrey said. “And they weren't in the Bay of Pigs.”
    “Whatever,” she agreed crossly.
    “Demoness, only two adults can go on this mission, and they are already accounted for. The rest must be children, animals, mixed-breeds, or other. You do not qualify. Physically, if not mentally or emotionally, you are single-species adult.”
    Metria considered half a moment. Then she vanished, replaced by a soulful big-eyed little girl in a tattered patchwork dress. “I am Woe Betide,” she said. “A pitiful five-year-old orphan waif.”
    Ted and Monica sniggered. They had seen this coming.
    Humfrey glowered down at Woe. “Are you sure you want to invoke this loophole, demoness?”
    “O, yes, your Awesome Grumpiness. I am just a poor brave little match girl with matches that give folk their hearts' desires.” She produced a box of matches. “Shall I strike one for you, to make you less grumpy?”
    He ignored that. “And you won't revert and renege the moment I am out of sight?”
    “Never, O Auspicious Ancient.” A little halo appeared.
    The children's sniggers became stifled snorts. They loved seeing the auspicious grump get teased in his own lair. Metria was