StarofChristmas Read Online Free PDF

It thrills me to share myself. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I
feel like a public servant. Sure, there’s lots of meaningless sex. Yet
sometimes it’s more. I help people. I guess what I’m saying is, I don’t think I
can give it up. And what man would accept me as I am? Who could love a woman
who does what I do? Who would want me as a girlfriend?”
    For one crazy second, I think he might destroy all my
assumptions. His lips part and I pretend I can see arguments and denials about
to fly free.
    Then he sighs.
    “It’s a lot to ask of a man. It turns me on to imagine you
with other clients. It’d be easy to deny the complications and say that’s all
that matters. But how does that work long term? Would you get married?
Have a family? I can’t picture it, Star.”
    A tiny piece of my heart breaks. “I can’t either.”
    I’ve sacrificed something fantastic for something
soul-deep—a calling interwoven in the fabric of my being. So I try to assuage
his conscience. After all, I forced him to admit my irreparable faults. I don’t
blame him for making the only sane choice.
    “It’s not as if you could take a hooker home and introduce
her to your parents during a traditional holiday dinner, right? What a
disaster.”
    He chuckles with me at the idea, but his hand blankets my
fingers, squeezing lightly. “At least we have the window.”
    “I’ll always be glad to see you there, Rick.”
    “Same here, Star. Same here.”

Act Two
     
    I can hardly believe this is the same place Rick stretched
our boundaries. Triple X has been transformed into a wicked winter wonderland.
I stand beside my guide into this unusual territory, our fingers linked. When
had that happened?
    An ice-blue silk robe wraps around my nude form, more to
limit distractions than to protect my vacant sense of modesty.
    “Who knew Santa’s Workshop could party like that?” I tilt my
head to puzzle out what’s what in the tangle of limbs on top of a toy
workbench.
    “No shit.”
    “Are you nervous, Rick?” His palm is sweating in my grasp.
    “Terrified.” He angles his body toward me until we’re
standing face-to-face. “I’ve never seen this kind of crowd. I’m positive we’re
violating the fire marshal’s limit. Tommy told me this morning a flood of calls
hit the ticket booth asking for admission at any cost after our performance
last night.”
    The knowledge warms me. I would pay an awful lot to be there
again, in his arms, exploring our raw passion.
    “Don’t be nervous. Ignore them. All that matters is what we
share. The scene and the sparks between us.”
    “Nice one.” He shakes off some of his gloom and laughs.
    Except I hadn’t intended my statement to be funny. The
inadvertent pun does strike a chord though. “How did the session with Jeremy go
this morning?”
    “Umm. It was enlightening.” He won’t meet my stare. “I’ve
watched him training Chloe for this show. Dozens of sessions. It’s different
when you’re the one administering the electrostimulation. Or receiving it.”
    Holy shit.
    “You let Jeremy touch you?” Why hadn’t I come to observe?
The thought has me panting.
    “Yeah. I wasn’t comfortable doing something to you unless I
understood what it felt like firsthand.” I swear his cheeks are turning
brighter by the minute. “He drained me dry. I hope you enjoy yourself as much
as I did.”
    “At your hands, I’m sure I will.”
    “Star, I know Tommy gave us a safe word, but you have other
options. If you change your mind or can’t go through with it, we can act it
out. No one has to know. No pressure.” He cups my shoulders in his capable
hands. “I’ll take you out of here so fast no one will figure out what happened
until it’s too late.”
    “You’d lose your job.”
    “There are other places to work.” He rubs his thumb over my
cheek. It thrills me enough I don’t remind him of my stage makeup. “You’re more
important. I don’t care what papers we signed.”
    “And