Stand Strong: You Can Overcome Bullying (and Other Stuff That Keeps You Down) Read Online Free PDF Page B

like my brother and sister. I had to make my bed, clean my room, and run the vacuum cleaner! If I complained about it being harder for someone without arms or legs—and believe me, I did—my parents told me to figure it out. Theirs wasn’t exactly tough love, but they wanted me to be able to handle everything the world might throw at me.
    My family, including all my cousins, treated me like a normal kid. They teased me and made jokes at my expense, but always with love and affection. I didn’t always understand why my parents expected me to do everything on my own, but now I do, and I’m grateful for it. They had a son who lacked legs, but they wanted me to stand on my own.
    As I got older, I wanted to do that desperately. I hated the thought of being dependent on other people, and I took pride in figuring out how to do things on my own. My parents encouraged that, and they helped devise ways for me to turn onlights, brush my teeth, comb my hair, and do other tasks without limbs.
    Those small victories over my disabilities gave me strength for bigger challenges later in life—but I had to learn to tap into them to build my confidence. There are a lot of things you can’t control when you are young. Most teens depend on their parents for food, clothing, shelter, transportation, and spending money. You are not financially independent. You can’t move into a penthouse apartment or beachfront condo. Yet even when you become financially independent as an adult, many things are still beyond your control.
    We can choose to take responsibility for our own happiness and our responses to being bullied.
    The good news is that while you can’t control certain things that happen to you—like bullies, storms, illness, or challenges at home—you can choose whether you respond in a negative or positive manner. No matter where I am speaking in the world, whether it’s central California, South America, or China, young people ask me how I can be so joyful when I have such severe physical disabilities. I tell them it’s because I choose to focus instead on all the good things in my life.
    I have a choice. You have a choice. We can choose to give into self-pity or victimhood when bullies pick on us, or we can choose to take responsibility for our own happiness and our responses to being bullied. Teens may not have as much control over their lives as adults, but it’s a powerful thing to take control of your actions, especially your responses to life’s challenges.
    When you think of being bullied, it’s usually in terms of another person who is taunting you, pushing you around, or ostracizing you socially. But there are many other forms of bullying, including religious persecution, dictatorships, sex slavery, and physical and sexual abuse. Even illnesses and disabilities can be bullies in a sense because they restrict your freedom and try to limit your life. Melissa wrote about this in an inspiring e-mail she sent to me:
    I am from a little town in England. I have two very rare conditions—Dystonia [a neurological movement disorder] and Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome. It started with a hairline fracture in my ankle and now I am wheelchair bound. I cannot walk at all, and there is a 90% chance I will lose my right leg from the knee down. The Dystonia is a neurological condition that we didn’t know I had until I broke my ankle, it was underlying and once that was set off, the CRPS started to affect me. I was asked to leave college because I wanted to do physiotherapy. I ended up doing physio every week … for 15 months,and twice a day for 30 minutes every day at home. Turns out that physio would never help me, and I’m currently seeing the “top” doctors to see if my hips and left leg can be saved. Anyway, once I realized that this condition was for life, I made the decision that I wanted to help others, I wanted to inspire others, just like Nick. And I know that Nick believes in God (I don’t, but I’m open minded and