Squirrel Cage Read Online Free PDF

turned to a face of compassion, feeling the intense emotion that I was attempting to express.
    After my “brief” introduction, the moderator asked other members for a reaction. One or two offered bland and insincere comments. Then she asked Andrea if she would like to say something.
    My new friend said “NO!” and buried her face in her hands ever deeper.
    “Andrea, I would really like you to offer your feelings.” The moderator said.
    Andrea straightened up slightly, keeping her hands over her face. I could tell that she was crying. “All I can tell you,” she started , “is that I find myself in a room with intense and dark evil. Satan is here with us. I can’t be here. I can’t respond to this. I need to leave.”
    She quickly got up and left the room in tears. I felt terrible. I slumped back into my little world. I let the Squirrel spin the cage in my mind. She’d run, but she was still silent. The environmental happenings around my being became second stage to the spinning cage.
    The moderator, desperately trying to get the group back under control, said “Please everyone, settle down. We are here to solve problems, not condemn our peers. Give me a minute and let me check on Andrea.” She left the room and suddenly I became acutely aware of 5 pairs of eyes drilling down on me. As I glanced around the circle, each woman would quickly look at something else. Jim looked my way with a face wrought with concern.
    I watched the seconds tick on the clock until the moderator returned. “Andrea will be sitting out this session. Now, let’s continue. Who else wants to comment on Cindi’s revelation? Jim would you like to comment?” she queried.
    “Sure I would Ms. Moderator. Cindi is the only honest person here. She and I had a long chat last night. Now I don’t know much about you Mormons and I’m not a real religious man…. But let me tell you that Cindi is the finest god damned Christian that I have ever met. She is honest and was the very first person to talk to me here. None of you have even said shit to me. I know that you are afraid of me but damn it, I am a real person. I have feelings too and Cindi knows that and has tried to help me. I know that there are some of you here who got to know Cindi last night and instantly liked her. I heard you laughing and talking in the common last night. You’d better not condemn her now. She’s not any different. You just know about her fucking past.”
    “Jim, please refrain from swearing,” cautioned the moderator.
    Jim had expressed himself with passion . “ I know that it was significantly different than their common group experience last night , ” he finalized.
    A pause hung in the air as everyone figured out what to do next. I looked at the moderator. Her returned glance said , “Let’s go with the flow .”
    She looked at each member of the group. Most squirmed in their seats. Finally, Jane broke the tension.
    “Yea h . What Jim said,” she stated proudly. “I don’t know Cindi but the first words out of her mouth hit me right. I like her.”
    Slowly but surely, life came back to the group. W e continued on with the rest of our stories and solicited comment and advice from the other members. I could tell that some of the others were definitely having a hard time with me in the room as we continued. But continue we did , and the time allotment for group session arrived too soon .
    “Well,” the moderator started, “this has been the most interesting group session I’ve observed for some time. I encourage you to get together and discuss it. Please.” She stood and walked back to her office.
    I headed straight for the dining area. My throat was irritatingly dry. I needed a soda. I opened the door and retrieved a Diet Coke. I turned and sat down, shocked to see Jim sitting across the table from me.
    “You did okay Cindi.” I tell you that was the best god damned thing I’ve ever seen.”
    Jane joined us at the table. “May I sit with you