senior staff prefer one shift we can change the rota and make it permanent.â
Again there was the murmur of the womanâs voice, and the sound of running water, splashing as if someone was washing their hands.
The man said, âHow right you are; like the bloody secret service if you ask me. Was my grandmother born in the United Kingdom. Bloody sauce! I put âyesâ to everything.â
When I switched off the light the conversation suddenly stopped. I waited in the darkness, not moving. The light from the tiny office was still on. If this door was opened they would be certain to see me. There was the sound of a towel machine and then of a match striking. Then the conversation continued, but more distantly. I tiptoed across the room very very slowly. I closed the second door and looked at the alterations to the wardrobe while retreating through it. This false door behind the wardrobe puzzled me even more than the curious little operating theatre. If a man was to construct a secret chamber with all the complications of securing the lease to his next door apartment, if he secretly removed large sections of brickwork, if he constructed a sliding door and fitted it into the back of a built-in wardrobe, would such a man not go all the way, and make it extremely difficult to detect? This doorway was something that even the rawest recruit to the Customs service would find in a perfunctory look round. It made no sense.
The phone rang. I picked it up. âYour cab is outside now, sir.â
There are not many taxi services that say âsirâ nowadays. That should have aroused my suspicions, but I was tired.
I went downstairs. On the first-floor landing outside the caretakerâs flat there were two men.
âPardon me, sir,â said one of the men. I thought at first they were waiting for the caretaker, but as I tried to pass one of them stood in the way. The other spoke again. âThere have been a lot of break-ins here lately, sir.â
âSo?â
âWeâre from the security company who look after this block.â It was the taller of the two men whoâd spoken. He was wearing a short suede overcoat with a sheepskin lining. The sort of coat a man needed if he spent a lot of time in doorways. âAre you a tenant here, sir?â he said.
âYes,â I said.
The taller man buttoned the collar of his coat. It seemed like an excuse to keep his hands near my throat. âWould you mind producing some identification, sir?â
I counted ten, but before I was past five the shorter of the men had pressed the caretakerâs buzzer. âWhat is it now?â
âThis one of your tenants?â said the tall man.
âIâm from number eighteen,â I prompted.
âNever seen him before,â said the man.
âYouâre not the caretaker,â I said. âCharlie Short is the caretaker.â
âCharlie Short used to come over here now and again to give me a break for a couple of hours â¦â
âDonât give me that,â I said. âCharlie is the caretaker. Iâve never seen you before.â
âA bloody con man,â said the man from the caretakerâs flat.
âIâve lived here for five years,â I protested.
âGet on,â said the man. âNever seen him before.â He smiled as if amused at my gall. âThe gentleman in number eighteen has lived here for five years but heâs much older than this bloke â bigger, taller â this one would pass for him in a crowd, but not in this light.â
âI donât know what youâre up to â¦â I said. âI can prove â¦â Unreasonably my anger centred on the man who said he was the caretaker. One of the security men took my arm. âNow then, sir, we donât want any rough stuff, do we?â
âIâm going back to âWar and Peaceâ,â said the man. He closed the door forcefully enough to