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Now, let’s see if I can find which button to press… nope, obviously not that one!”
    “It should be the small green one marked ‘Disengage Ingress Aperture Linkage ’ .”
    “Ah yes there we go. Couldn’t it just say ‘Open Door’?”
    “Good idea Minister, don’t know why nobody thought of that.”
    A moment later Captain Watkins entered Susan’s office, accompanied by two of the candidates.
    “Hello! Who have we got here?” began Susan amiably.
    Watkins nodded at the recruits to indicate they should introduce themselves.
    “I’m Aster Madly, Minister. An honour to meet you.”
    “Lovely, lovely, and who’s this?”
    “I-I’m Freddie Clayton, Minister.”
    “Wonderful, take a seat won’t you? I just wanted to have a brief chat, nothing too scary I assure you!”
    “Shall I leave you to it Minister?” asked Captain Watkins.
    “Absolutely, thank you Jonathan, I’ll take it from here. Now then, Aster, I had a look at your résumé…” The Minister was shuffling some papers on her desk.
    “Oh dear, I’m afraid I put that together in a bit of a hurry.”
    “Nonsense, my dear, it was quite impressive actually. Honestly, when you’ve worked in the public sector as long as I have, your expectations tend to get somewhat… tempered, shall we say?”
    “Oh right, okay then!” Aster wasn’t sure how else to respond.
    “And as for yours Freddie, you clearly have some excellent technical qualifications.”
    “Th-thank you Minister,” said Freddie, shyly.
    Susan put the papers down and walked around the desk, perching on the corner in a manner clearly designed to put her visitors at ease.
    “Now then, let me have a proper look at you both.” She stared closely at each recruit in turn.
    “Er, what are you looking for?” asked Aster, slightly weirded out.
    “Don’t know really! They say the eyes are the window to the soul, do you believe that?”
    “I would p-personally take issue with the concept of a soul, Minister.”
    “Ooo! Would you Freddie, and why’s that, hmm?”
    “Oh, I’m not sure. Perhaps because no-one has been able to clearly define what it means.”
    “Good answer!”
    “How would you define ‘soul’, Minister?” asked Aster.
    “Me? Not a clue! But, by looking at your eyes I can certainly tell you’re both in tip top health, which is a good start.”
    “Why did you want to see us Minister, i-if you don’t mind me asking?”
    “Of course not dear boy! Truth be told, I’ve heard all sorts of stories about this Mars recruitment process. I just wanted to check for myself that we’re not enlisting complete idiots.”
    “And…?” prompted Aster.
    “Well you two clearly aren’t complete idiots!”
    “That’s a great weight off my mind,” replied Aster with a grin.

5. Take a Walk on the Wilder Side
    “M-A-X-I-M-I-Z-E.”
    “Groan.”
    “With the triple word score, that’s 84 points.”
    “Please, don’t forget your bonus 50 points for using all your tiles.”
    “…making a grand total of 134 points. Not too shabby, eh Commander?”
    “Alan, has anyone ever mentioned you might be a little too competitive?”
    “Don’t be like that, you can still catch up.”
    “Statistically speaking, that seems unlikely.”
    “Commander, I’m getting an incoming communiqué from the next transport.”
    “Okay, bring it up.”
    The Scrabble board faded from view, to be replaced by the face of Flight Lieutenant Banks.
    “Greetings Wilder, any chance you boys could open up a landing strip for us?”
    “Good afternoon Banks, might be able to arrange that. What are you carrying today?”
    “We’ve got a special treat for you today Commander. A whole transport full of fresh faced recruits for the Mars training programme.”
    “Alan, did you hear that? Weren’t you just saying that all the strips are occupied right now?”
    “Yes, that’s quite right sir, there’s no possibility of taking additional landings today. Possibly if you make a couple of orbits and try