Songs of Love and War Read Online Free PDF Page A

the beauty of the night, but even though she was aware of a sense of longing she didn’t recognize it for what it was – a
yearning for love. It was so familiar she had mistaken it for something pleasant and those hours staring into the stars had become as habitual to Kitty as howling at the moon to a craving wolf.
    At length Miss Grieve appeared in the doorway, stiff and severe with her hair pulled back into a tight bun, as if she had beaten her emotions into submission and restrained them within her
corset. There was no evidence of tears on her rigid cheeks or about her slate-grey eyes and Kitty wondered for a moment whether she had imagined them. What was it that had made Miss Grieve so
bitter? ‘It’s time for your supper, young lady,’ she said to Kitty. ‘Have you washed your hands?’ Kitty dutifully presented her palms to her governess, who sniffed her
disapproval. ‘I didn’t think so. Go and wash them at once. I don’t think it’s right for a young lady to be running about the countryside like a stray dog. I’ll have a
word with your mother. Perhaps piano lessons will be a good discipline for you and keep you out of trouble.’
    ‘Piano lessons have done little for Elspeth,’ Kitty replied boldly. ‘And when she sings she sounds like a strangled cat.’
    ‘Don’t be insolent, Kitty.’
    ‘Victoria sounds even worse when she plays the violin. More like a chorus of strangled cats. I should like to sing.’ Kitty poured cold water from the jug into the water bowl and
washed her hands with carbolic soap. So far there had been no piano or violin lessons for her, because music was her mother’s department and Kitty was invisible to Maud Deverill. The only
reason she had enjoyed riding lessons since the age of two was due to her father’s passion for hunting and racing. As long as he lived no child of his would be incompetent in the saddle.
    ‘You’re nine now, Kitty, it’s about time you learned to make yourself appealing. I don’t see why music lessons can’t be afforded to you as they are to your sisters.
I will speak to your mother tomorrow and see that it is arranged. The less free time you have, the better. The Devil makes work for idle hands.’
    Kitty followed Miss Grieve into the nursery where dinner for two was laid up at the table otherwise used for lessons. They stood behind their chairs to say grace and then Miss Grieve sat down
while Kitty brought the dish of stew and baked potatoes to the table from the dumb waiter which had been sent up from the kitchen. ‘What is it about you that your parents don’t wish to
see you at mealtimes?’ Miss Grieve asked as Kitty sat down. ‘I understand from Miss Gibbons that luncheon was always a family affair when your siblings were small.’ She helped
herself to stew. ‘Perhaps it’s because you don’t yet know how to behave. In my previous position for Lady Billow I always joined the family for luncheon, but I ate my dinner
alone, which was a blessed relief. Are we to share this table until you come of age?’
    Kitty was used to Miss Grieve’s mean jibes and tried not to be riled by them. Wit was her only defence. ‘It must be for your pleasure, Miss Grieve, because otherwise you might get
lonely.’
    Miss Grieve laughed bitterly. ‘And I suppose you consider yourself good company, do you?’
    ‘I must be better company than loneliness.’
    ‘I wouldn’t be so sure. For a nine-year-old you have an inappropriate tongue. It’s no wonder your parents don’t wish for the sight of you. Victoria and Elspeth are young
ladies, but you, Kitty, are a young ragamuffin in need of taming. That the task should fall to me is a great trial, but I do the best I can out of the goodness of my heart. We’ve a long way
to go before you’re in any fit state to find a husband.’
    ‘I don’t want a husband,’ said Kitty, forking a piece of meat into her mouth. It was cold in the centre.
    ‘Of course you don’t want one now. You’re a