Someday: 3 (Sunrise) Read Online Free PDF Page A

she might’ve wound up in the same kindergarten class as the baby girl they’d just seen. The girls might’ve played soccer together or been on the same cheerleading squad. They might’ve been best friends.
    Ashley’s heart hurt, and she pulled her arms in close around her middle. She hadn’t gained much weight with Sarah, and her relatively flat stomach only made her feel worse. She slid down the bench seat and leaned against Landon. “I miss her so much.” Her voice cracked. “I only held her for a few hours.” She held her arms out from her body, remembering the feel of her infant daughter there just yesterday.
    “God’s so good.” Landon’s voice was thick. He hadn’t said much but only because he was clearly struggling too. “She only had a few hours, but no baby was ever loved more in so short a time.”
    A smile lifted Ashley’s lips even as more tears filled her eyes. “It was a miracle, how she looked so healthy, how everyone was there, surrounding us.” She sniffed. “I’ll always remember it.”
    “And God will use her life. We have to believe that.”
    Ashley nodded. She believed. No matter how great the heartache of losing Sarah, Ashley didn’t doubt God. On several occasions during her pregnancy the Lord had reminded her to look for Him in the quiet whispers. And then in Sarah’s final hour, there was her firstborn son, Cole, whispering to her about the picture he colored of Ashley’s mother somewhere in heaven, holding tight to baby Sarah.
    Even this morning, before Landon came to pick her up, Ashley could feel the Lord speaking to her. Sadder than she’d been since the death of her mother, she had taken her Bible from the hospital nightstand and flipped to Psalm 46. Partway through she stumbled onto a verse that had helped her a number of times, a verse she hadn’t read in a long while. “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”
    In moments like this God wasn’t asking Ashley to be victorious or walk through the door smiling. He was asking her only to stand, to be still, and to know that she didn’t have to have the answers, because the Lord already had them figured out. “Be still, and know that I am God. . . .” Yes, she still believed.
    “Ash . . .” Landon’s voice was unrushed and gentle. “We should get going. Cole and Devin are back at the house with your dad.” He kissed the top of her head. “You okay?”
    She nodded and used the backs of her hands to wipe her face. She straightened, and with what little energy she had, she pulled the seat belt across and snapped it into place. “When Mom needs a break from holding Sarah—” Ashley turned her wet eyes toward the man she loved so deeply—“you know who’ll hold her.”
    “Who?” He slid the key into the ignition and waited.
    “Irvel.” Ashley smiled at the memory of the dear, sweet woman from the Sunset Hills Adult Care Home, Ashley’s friend when she worked there.
    Landon’s grin lightened his expression. “You think so?”
    “I do.” She sniffed again. “Irvel and Mom’ll share a cup of peppermint tea, and Sarah will be right there.”
    It was a comforting picture, and Ashley and Landon let the image stay between them, their linked hands all the communication they needed.
    Ashley’s dad must’ve known how difficult the ride home would be, because when they walked through the front door, the house was quiet.
    Cole peeked around the corner of the kitchen and gave them a tentative smile and a halfhearted wave. “Hi.” He stepped into view. “Papa put Devin down for a nap. He said that might be best. Plus, Devin was tired.”
    “How are you, Coley?” Ashley held out her arms. Silently she said a prayer that lasted only as long as it took for her to draw a breath, thanking God that her sons hadn’t had anencephaly, that they were here and whole and healthy.
    Cole came to her, a little slower than usual. He looked at Landon.