Sidelined Read Online Free PDF

Jude, and had all the time in the world to practice. While I made up my own face I often imagined how it would be to work on other people but I’d never put much real thought into doing anything about it. Never believed I’d be good enough.
    “Do you seriously think I could do it?”
    Leah smiled. “Of course. You’ve already got the skills, they just need to be refined. You’d be amazing.”

Chapte r 4 – The Day That Changed My Life
     
    For the first time ever, I couldn’t wait to end the visit with Jesse so I could go home and do some research. Leah had lit a fire under me. Maybe this would be my “thing” to help me find out who I wanted to be, without being defined only as Jude Collinson’s wife.
    Perhaps make-up artist sounded like the kind of air-headed profession a girl like me would get into. I didn’t care about that. I cared about finding a way to stop the boredom, and having something interesting to tell people beyond, ‘ Today I made Jude spaghetti bolognese for dinner, and before that I bought some shoes’.
    I spent more than an hour online, searching for make-up courses in Los Angeles. There were so many. The job seemed real competitive, though. In this city there’s no point trying anything unless you’re sure you’ll be the best, or damn close. I can do this . I made Kayla look gorgeous, and did so in a super sort time, too. What if I’d had longer to play around? What kind of awesome might happen if I had hours to work instead of minutes?
    Excitement took over me. This was it. Something I could be enthusiastic about. Something I’d enjoy. I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful for what I already had. I wasn’t. Not at all. But I hadn’t contributed. I hadn’t earned the big house with the swimming pool. I hadn’t paid for any of the state-of-the-art gym equipment or the plush furniture. Any money I had came from Jude's bank account and I was tired of it. I wanted to bring something into our household besides mindless chatter. Mostly I wanted to chase away the feeling of being destined to spend the rest of my life rattling around the house, living for the weekends; the weekends Jude wasn’t playing soccer in a different city.
     
    By the time Jude got home I'd decided on a course and written down all the information I needed to give to Jude.
    I pounced on him the second he walked into the living room, where I'd been bouncing around, desperate to tell him my idea.
    “Easy, Bree.” He laughed as he caught me in his arms. “Was I gone that long?”
    “Well, yes you were but that's not why I'm jumping on you.”
    Jude kissed me, long and sweet, and my heart swelled. Life was about to get perfect.
    “So, what's going on?” He set me down on the sofa and sat beside me, pulling me close. Mmmm cuddles. Well, I would have enjoyed the cuddles more if I could have contained my enthusiasm enough to sit still.
    “I went to Jesse's today and helped his sister to get ready for a party. We had fun, and then Leah had this idea that maybe I should do a make-up course!”
    Jude pulled away a little, frowning. “Are you serious?”
    Not the reaction I expected or wanted.
    “Yeah, I'm serious. Why? Don't you think it's a good idea?”
    He shrugged. “You've never mentioned anything about wanting to learn before.”
    “I know. I only just realised this is what I want.”
    “Because Leah suggested it?”
    My eyebrows rose . Jude’s prejudice strikes again. “You're really asking me that?”
    “It's a fair question, Bree. Be sure it's what you want, not what someone else wants for you.”
    The fact he hadn't spotted my recent unhappiness kinda pissed me off. Leah pinpointed my mood right away. I hadn’t done a good job of hiding the way I felt. How had he not noticed? Why hadn't he?
    “What do you want for me, Jude?” I asked in a tone I hadn't used in years. Cold. Un-me.
    Jude backed away a little farther, his eyebrows drawn in confusion. “What's this about?”
    “This is about you not