Sheila Connolly - Relatively Dead 02 - Seeing the Dead Read Online Free PDF Page B

can devise and carry out experiments. What I can’t do, at least not well, is communicate with other people. And empathize. I don’t connect with people.”
    “Except me.”
    “Well, yes. But what we’ve got I don’t begin to understand and I can’t explain.”
    “And that’s a problem for you. Or maybe I mean a puzzle.”
    “Yes, it is.”
    Abby sat back in her seat and looked out the window, at the busy parking lot, at the people going about their ordinary business, being normal. Somehow she’d slipped out of the “normal” slot, but now she didn’t know where she fit.
    She and Ned had come together because she had started seeing things. She’d had this kind of vision, and then he’d appeared. He’d been curious, and she could understand that. Maybe he’d thought or felt that if he could help her find a way to understand what was happening to her, he would understand himself better. How convenient for him, when a test subject dropped in his lap.
    And then they’d discovered this other thing—the intense connection that was triggered by physical touch, yet which she thought had a mental, even psychic component, and that he shared it. Had she been wrong? Had she been so hungry for simple affection and physical contact, after dealing with the strains of her relationship with Brad, that she’d blown it all out of proportion? And had Ned been no more than a horny geek who’d fed off her hunger? Was any of this real?
    She was tired of being led around by the nose, of catering to someone else’s needs and wants, of playing someone else’s game. That was what Brad had done to her: robbed her of her will, made her question her own identity and judgment. Was Ned any different?
    She stood up abruptly and gathered up her trash. “Can you take me home now?”
    “What?” Ned appeared startled. “Well, if that’s what you want. I thought we could—”
    “I’m sorry, but I need some time to think. When we’re together, things get too … distracting.” She stood there, unsmiling, waiting.
    He finally stood as well. “All right,” he said quietly. “I’ll take you home.”
    The trip back to Abby’s house was silent—the silence so thick she could almost see it. More than once she started to say something, but then stopped herself. She was not going to be the one to smooth things over, not again. She was not going to make nice, just to keep the peace. She didn’t want to hurt Ned, who had done nothing wrong, but she needed time to work things out for herself, and she knew she couldn’t do that if they were together.
    He pulled into her driveway and stopped, then turned to her. “Abby, can’t we talk about this?” The look on his face nearly broke her heart.
    “Ned, I’m sorry, but this is something I have to work out for myself. Maybe we let things go too far, too fast. I met you at a rocky time in my life. I mean, really—I start seeing ghosts, I get a new job, I dump my boyfriend, I have to move. All of those are major stressors, and don’t psychiatrists say not to take on too much at once? Well, I didn’t see a choice, and I’m happy about the job and getting Brad out of my life.”
    “And where do I come into this?” Ned said, in a tone that was ridiculously reasonable.
    “I don’t know. That’s what I need to think about. I know you’re important to me, but I don’t know where you fit. Can you understand that?”
    Ned sat back in his seat and stared out the windshield. “I think so. I’ll try, anyway. But I’m not going to believe that this is over—any part of it. I’ll give you all the space you want, but I’m not going away. You know where to reach me.”
    “Thank you,” Abby said hoarsely, then scrambled out of the car before she started to cry. She stood in the driveway, watching as he pulled away—and wondering what she had just done.
    Once inside, she wandered aimlessly from room to room. They were nice rooms, but they weren’t hers. She’d have to make some sort