Saving Cicadas Read Online Free PDF Page A

nice guy, and gotten married. Oh, who am I kidding? But being a mom . . . it’s the only thing I’m proud of. Being a mother is the only thing that makes any sense to me at all. It’s who I am.”
    â€œSo you’re saying you’re gonna keep the baby?” My heart raced, and I looked out the open window at a green lizard scurrying up the gutter. Mama stayed silent, rubbing her temples.
    â€œI just need to take some time to figure this out.”
    â€œOh. Okay. But Mama, I’ve been thinking. I’m kind of excited about being a real big sister. I mean, I know it won’t be easy and all, but, well, I can get a job bagging at the grocery store. I can help out. I can. It’ll be good. You’re a really great mama.”
    She interrupted me, screaming, “Uuugh! I am just so angry !” I looked over at her in horror.
    â€œHa! You’re angry? You ought to be angry. At yourself. Imagine, a single woman your age, expecting. It’s indecent.”
    â€œGrandma Mona, please. I didn’t even hear you come in.”
    â€œWell, I’m here now. And is that any way to welcome me to your home, Janie? I’m her mother; I’m needed at a time like this.”
    There was really nothing more I could say. My grandmother was a force to be reckoned with. And not in a good way. More like an iceberg. Since I’d turned about four or five, I could only remember a handful of times she’d left me feeling the teensiest bit warm and fuzzy. She wasn’t always this way though. I could remember her kisses and hugs when I was little, her telling me she loved me. But not anymore. The older she got, the meaner she got. And I had to protect Mama from her.
    Rainey came at us waving a piece of paper. She had this strange look on her face. “Mama?” She showed it to her. “The world gonna end. When Jesus comes.”
    â€œRainey, what?” Mama asked, confused and trying to reach for the paper.
    â€œWe got to get ready,” said Rainey. “It says right here.”
    Mama studied the paper called “Jesus Is Coming,” and shook her head. But I thought I understood it, and it just made me sad.
    â€œShe’s talking about you being pregnant,” I mumbled. “She keeps printing out baby things and won’t stop. Would you please tell her to stop it?”
    â€œRainey? What’s going on, honey?”
    Rainey smiled as if she was fully in tune with what was going on for once and could contribute to our conversation. She often felt left out.
    â€œYou got the baby Jesus in the tummy,” said Rainey, poking the paper. “Jesus is coming. And the world gonna end. He not the reg’lar person, Mama.”
    â€œOh, this is rich,” said Grandma Mona, folding her arms and leaning against the wall.
    â€œThe world is not going to end, honey,” Mama said. “And would you please stop printing things? This paper costs money.”
    â€œJanie,” said Grandma Mona. “You told that poor child your mother is having the baby Jesus?” Her voice was flat and critical.
    I stood up, unable to take any more and screamed, “No I did not, Grandma Mona! She figured that out all on her own. And I tell you what, I’ve been waiting for angels to come and tell us about this baby, but I haven’t seen any! Not a one! So I don’t know. Is Mama carrying the Son of God, or not?!” I waved my finger in the air. “She could be, for all you know! Mama’s a good girl. You might be carrying the Savior, Mama! You’re gonna save the whole world as we know it!”
    â€œThat is quite enough!” said Grandma Mona.
    I closed my fists and burst out of the room. I didn’t even look back. I wasn’t sure what’d come over me, but I was crying and scratching at the door to the bedroom. The knob always stuck. When I finally got it open, I shoved all Rainey’s clothes off my bottom bunk and flopped